i don't want to keel over from a heart attack and have the first responders open up my phone and see my timeline and be like "oh, this guy followed a bunch of people on twitter who watched the oscars".
you called me "reddit"... ( walking to mirror) you called me "reddit". (taking out razor) you called me reddit. (shaving head into mohawk) you called me... reddit? (putting razor down) you called me, reddit... (picking up shoulder-fired rocket launcher) you fucking called me redd
It's adorable how spitefully jealous longoids (men with penises over 3 inches in length) get when us normal men mention how pleasant it feels to try using a different finger for jerking off. I mean, sorry for your deformity bro, but you're not really engendering much sympathy! βοΈ