Jordan Gutierrez

Some call it a “dad bod.” I call it a “father figure.” Big fan of Marvel comics. Go Chargers.

[ChargersMemes @ChargersMemes]

Travis Kelce vs. Rob Gronkowski vs. Antonio Gates, all time:

Receiving yards:

Gates 3rd
Kelce 4th
Gronk 6th

Touchdowns:

Gates 1st
Gronk 3rd
Kelce 5th

Receptions:

Gates 3rd
Kelce 4th
Gronk 10th

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Limes > Lemons

I am willing to die on this hill

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Slip knot and System of a Down are now dad rock. #FightMe

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

I don’t want to speculate too much, but Willy Wonka would have some huge problems if OSHA visited his chocolate factory.

[nutter butter @NutterButter]

N is for the way you nut at me

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Happy Father’s Day to all the dudes who used their balls to create souls.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

You can’t prove that you don’t have a stalker. Maybe they’re just really good.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

@kowsims Some people prefer Nutter Butters over Oreos.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Controversial snack food hot take:

Nutter Butters > Oreos

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

@SagED_UP Nathan Peterman, Josh Freeman, Josh Rosen, and Blaine Gabbert.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Me: Did you know Blue is a girl?
My 3-Year-Old: No. Blue is a dog.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Undying love and eternal patience are not the same thing, child. Do not confuse them. #DrDoom

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Not gonna lie, the USFL feels different. But it’s football.

[Will Compton @_willcompton]

The baby just shit through her diaper and some got on my hand. I am handling it like I thought I would

The police are almost here

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Doctors always say to not shake babies. They never said that about toddlers though…

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Just a friendly reminder, in case you need one. Mother’s Day is one month away.

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

“Are you sure there’s no butthole?” #PamAndTommy

[Jeff Kerr @JeffKerrPHL]

Only one player in #NFL history has 5,000 passing yards and 300 rushing yards in a season.

Justin Herbert (2021)

#Chargers

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

“Keep your butthole in the bowl!” #PottyTrainingPhrases

[Jordan Gutierrez @BarbaricJordan]

Tom Telesco telling the front office he wants to sign another defensive player: