Khan of Lake Ontario

in desperate need of a beer

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

All I need this summer is to blackout while listening to Pitbull

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

How does HR know that it’s not okay to have a little bit of beer at work?

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

“I bet he listens to hardcore music at the gym” yeah you caught me

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

@Playgroundslyde @F1NN5TER Brother, this one is all you

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Maybe she’ll remember I exist if she learns I have a vampire-core music playlist

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

My greatest accomplishment this year is hitting 500+ connections on LinkedIn

[The Mac Miller Memoir @MacMillerMemoir]

Mac Miller’s intimate Tiny Desk performance dropped 5 years ago today. 🕊 @nprmusic

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Everything would be okay if only I was way down yonder on the Chattahoochee

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Nissan Versa drivers are my nemesis

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Had sex with the beat, contracted hearing aids

[The Irishman @Playgroundslyde]

My stance on the first week of classes

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Exams are actually destroying me. My eye won’t stop twitching

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Nvm, a homeless man jumped the line. Morals returned

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Being first in line waiting for the beer store to open will have you questioning your choices in life

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

A man just asked how much to buy my thrifted jacket. Told him he couldn’t offer enough. On my peak shit

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

What’s the uncertainty error on McDonalds triple thick milkshakes? 3 ± 0.2 thick?

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

I will do everything in my power to not be the one who submits the group assignment.

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Nothing like discovering I have a gaping hole in one of my shoes the first day it pisses rain

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Sobering up just in time to get plastered once again

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

LCBO run complete ✅ Cirrhosis secured

[Khan of Lake Ontario @BeersAssassin]

Got told my thrifted shirt was fire today. Best day of my life