Ben Burr

🪆

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

I need to get through these deep breaths as fast as possible so I can continue having a panic attack

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

I understand the appeal of Animal Crossing purely for the fantasy of moving furniture being that fucking easy

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

My mind is like a mid-century modern home: gorgeous with ample storage space

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Uncut starburst log

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Everybody with their brights these days!! (Tweeting this while driving)

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

It was such a big deal when all the extroverts had to stay inside but no one is talking about how now all the introverts are being cast back out of heaven

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Need an enema from a female… NOT SEXUAL

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Your dick stops growing the first time you measure it

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

“Counter Culture” implies ���Culture” but we live in America, babeeeeyy!!!!

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Just now realizing how much a name tag feels like a collar

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

You should have to fill out a Scholastic Summer Reading-esque chart denoting you’ve practiced for over 10,000 hours before you’re allowed to post your shitty art

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Why is every skinny nosed medium length blonde haired man in surf shorts and his thirties so sad

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

I hate to tell you this but your kids are bad. Just, really… they suck. My kids? My kids? They will be good. Okay!

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

What’s keeping us, as a society, from drinking sauce?

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

Affirmation: Cory Wong doesn’t only make music that sounds like an advertisement

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

my morning routine? simple.
step one: wake up
step two: play ‘rock and roll all nite’ by kiss over the alexa while i scream and push out hot brown mud

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

i’m worried that blippi might have a bigger dick than me

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

my penis gets sucked, my DICK gets BLOWN… keep it going

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

videos of people dancing should be illegal

[Ben Burr @BenBurrAnus]

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