Benson Dunwoody

{parody account}
one of those slackers got into my office and signed me up for this twitter app too bad i found out its mine now and im not giving it back

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@0h_Crumbs thanks man

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

hello everyone i managed to escape the void and right after i realized that no matter what i do that those 2 slackers wont stay fired so instead of getting mad and throwing a fit i told pops that i was quitting he tried to beg me to stay
im going to keep using twitter though

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@JusticeFr0mHell //dear god

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

well welcome to the void so how did you wind up here blood ritual teleportation ect?

[The Conductor. @Conductorpekc]

GUYS I CANT SEE ANYTHING

IM IN THE VOID

IM BLIND!

Got FUCKED by Elon and now I can’t look at posts :( }}

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

//ok this seems out of left field hi im the person running the account im just gonna say the real reason i haven't been posting today is my power has been out thanks to a bunch of heavy rain so i tried to make a cannon explanation why he hasn't posted
sorry

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

so if yall have been wondering where i have been for that last 23 hours my phone died and down here in this stupid abyss theres really no way to charge it so i have been waiting on thunder strikes to hit a metal pole i set up it usually charges it 5% each strike

i hate it here

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@0h_Crumbs that would be nice if only i wasnt suck in this void those two caused me to end up in by some dumb blood sacrifice

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

so i know this seems out of left field from me but i guess where im currently stuck in this dark hellscape i guess i might as well run this

what is the best potato chip flavor?

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

so mordecai and rigby decided to prank me by doing some dumb blood sacrifice to send me to this hellish void

I SWEAR THE MOMENT I GET OUT I AM GOING TO FIRE THEM SO BAD THAT THEY WISH THEY WHERE DOWN HERE!

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@0h_Crumbs cuz everytime i try they just find someway to convince the entire pack to rally against me until i have no choice but to rehire them its annoying as all hell

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

dear god what the hell kind of gas did Rigby order to be dropped on the house to make me see this shit

now leave my hall or YOUR FIRED

And also put on a shirt that fully covers your chest cuz i dont want to see any of that

[Monkey D. Luffy @G0muG0muNoMi]

Hey, you're out of everything in the kitchen

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

if you think kids are annoying try

having to fight waiters so you can get someone out of a coma

being pinned to a wall and being used as a dispenser for a bunch of biker unicorns

dealing with the end of the world
and constantly having a migraine cuz of 2 slackers

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

kinda rude of you pal to scream at me like that
and to the other i did it cuz i need to fire two slackers who have constantly gotten on my nerves

[Hugh & Nate @PKMNtrainerhugh]

@BensonDunw48587
🔵:I still don't know why you offered me a job randomly...
🟤:HOLY SHIT IS THAT A TALKING GUMBALL MACHINE??!!

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@EmirattiRBX is it fine if i pick what ever has less calories?

cuz god soda has enough sugar to make you see space itself

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@IMPOSTORAM0NGUS yep and now its a dumb fucking letter the bird was better

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@uncommonblin that aint boyfriend thats boiend

[Benson Dunwoody @BensonDunw48587]

@stonesteves_alt so hows the kid gonna come out?