BerBurbs

full of hopes and dreams and anxiety

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Went to get a Pap smear today. Left with my dress tucked into my undies. Don’t know until I was on the elevator at work.

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

I eat cereal just so I can drink the milk

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

@MrBeast 4,683,927

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

I don’t ever press the button to keep my place in the call queue because when they’re ready I’ll forget who I called

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Logical me: let’s put away these groceries as soon as we get home

ADHD me: (opens pantry door) I’m sure there’s expired food in here

Proceeds to take everything out of pantry before all the groceries are even out of the car

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

@EllaJeanrz -4

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Getting older is being called ma’am instead of miss at check out

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

The worst part of summer is definitely the boob sweat

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Somewhere between I want to find the love of my life to I want to own 17 cats

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Nothing screams happy Sunday like a text from your mom that someone is watching adult material at her house in the guest YouTube profile

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

@hicasamadim 72

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Getting out of my car in the evening I’m hit with the aroma of delicate gardenia and old dog shit

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

I think I just walked in on my dog giving himself a bj

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

If I let you turn in front of me and you don’t wave I know you’re not from around here

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Hockey mom > soccer mom

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Searching for jobs while sitting at my desk because I’m tired of being treated like I’m stupid

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Work sent a text this morning to “stay in your lane”. It was about fog but I took it personal.

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

Everyone here buying groceries like they didn’t overbuy last week for the ice storm.

[BerBurbs @BerBurbs]

@devadandermudd For some reason these people think I should work