Sam Allardyce

Ex England's Gaffer, 100% record. COME AT ME BRA. #LADS Unite! #ParodyAccount

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

I could use a Pussy Sandwich right about now. #SpeakYourMind

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Send us a picture of your knockers I'm in need of some #mondaymotivation I'll make you famous.

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Shot my load inta Wife's brekky as she went t'fetch the paper. That extra protein will help her t'maintain a balanced diet #WorldPorridgeDay

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Oh I will be slaying some serious vaj at #Glastonbury let me tell you that. Nobody can resist the Big Lad in nothing but my Speedos

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

ME AN ME MUM AND ME DAD AND ME GRAN WE'RE OFF TO WATERLOO. ME AND ME MUM AND ME DAD AND ME GRAN WITH A BUCKET OF VINDALOO #XFactor

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

The definition of pain? Harry Kane & Roy Hodgson trying to have a conversation. Fuckin hurry up and spit it out I aint got all night #ENGMAL

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Odds on me smashing the Wife's back doors in tonight. 1/100 #InPlayWithRay

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

What do you call a stripper from Malta? 'A Malteaser' #ENGMAL

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Judging the first half performance, I think we're now joint favourites for the World Cup along with the Romanians. #ENGMAL

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Feet up watching the match with a Vindaloo & a can of Special Brew. The wife's in for it when we hit the sheets later.#ENGMAL

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

I think the Chinese Prem is my next stop, not only will I get vastly over paid. I think Chinese food is bloody belting. #ThursdayThoughts

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Roses are red, this poems sloppy. Come suck me off because my cock is floppy. #NationalPoetryDay

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Did @WayneRooney really criticise me? I run the 100m faster than you, you balloon.

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Massive Respect to @Tyson_Fury. The most down to earth guy ever & he's the Heavy Weight World Champion. Fuck the haters Tyson, you da boss

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

I'm the only England Manager in History with a 100% win record. There's a lot of others who claim the Title 'The Greatest Ever' but thats me

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Vaginas have balls, right?

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

I take one positive out of my England Reign, it's that I was banging the Chief Executive's MRS as he was calling to give me the sack #LAD

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Yes I renamed the Wifi at the England Training Camp to Big Sams Office, it's probably now called 'Little Gaz's Doll House'

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Me & Andy Carroll are off into town, 2 bitches on each arm. Get the pints in Lad you're on first round. #BigLadsOnTour

[Sam Allardyce @BigSamLAD]

Going for a pint in the Winchester and waiting for all of this to blow over