GoddessBizkit

she/her.4/20.Vegabond. Findom.OF VERIFIED.$39 tribute. $bizkitbitch9.

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

My freshly 18 year old. nephew left for #army boot camp a few weeks ago. This is his first letter home. I can’t stop laughing.

#fyp #bootcamp #military #funny #thursday

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

@DuchessSexpert I will bring the pitchforks. 💪🏼

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

💀💀

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

@DuchessSexpert It’s honestly the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while. 😂😂😂

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

This is literally the life I was programmed to have from the start.
The church mentality was so embedded in who we were. I am so so glad in so many ways that my PDA demanded that I go against the grain. I would without a doubt be in a horrible relationship with 10 kids by now.

[Adrienne Quinn Martin @MrsAMartini]

Evangelical women,or at least large percentage of them, hate their husbands. I’m incognito in some private evangelical wives pages .Been in them for years, they don’t talk about their kids, their church, politics … they only post about their husbands, because they hate them. ( I picture the husbands as less affluent kicker beard type guys)
A sample ..

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

He said “Oh they gone remember me.”

#kingcharles #portrait #wednesday

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

@DuchessSexpert I understand what you’re going through girl. I’m currently caregiving for both of my parents (moms paralyzed, my dad is disabled)

I’ve literally given up my income to take care of them and I got denied as a caregiver. I’m about to lose my car and no one in my family cares. 😭

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Omg they’re taking over the FB marketplace with their evangelism. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

My mother ate her pickle like it was a corn on the cob.

She’s a monster.

#Wednesday #mom

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

All of this talk about the solar eclipse and going blind has me freaked out and here’s my real question…what about my pets? Do they need glasses? How do I tell them they can’t look at the sun? 😭😭😭

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Sir…have you tried crab Rangoon?

(Not everyone’s goals are to look like this just fyi)

[Viking Dad @VikingDadWisdom]

Ladies, what’s stopping you from looking like this?

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Elote sourdough. My fb sourdough group saw it first of course but stay tuned.

I’m making elote bagels next 😏😏😏

With street corn cream cheese!

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

I can’t be the only one who sees snoop dogg.

[flaviusvalens @flaviusvalens1]

I see Evil William Shakespeare

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

When I say the dishes in the dishwasher are dirty that means put your fucking dishes in the dishwasher not the sink. If you are a grown adult and you haven’t figured that out yet please learn this. I’m tired 😭

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Facebook being down is the worst. Now I have to come to Twitter to scroll and it’s not as entertaining here.

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Thissss.

[Bourbon & Braves @WeiserPrincess]

The only thing saving this Monday is the crispy McDonalds Dr. Pepper.

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

I think you’re meaning the laborers who didn’t get paid by your father built that skyline.

[Acyn @Acyn]

Eric Trump: My father built the skyline of New York City. And this is the thanks he gets?

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Or when groceries are ten times the amount they used to be.

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

This looks like the smoothest ride ever.

[GoddessBizkit @Bizkitbitch9]

Happy anniversary of the time I sent my bf (at the time) a whole series of naughty pictures I had taken for him, and his response to me was “wow someone’s really feeling themselves.”

🤦🏼‍♀️🙅🏼‍♀️

(For the record, this is not an appropriate response to a goddess blessing you.)