Bernard Black

CLOSED

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Now good luck and goodbye.

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Here's your redundancy package. Here. I'm sorry that most of its in Kenobian wooden dollars but that's largely your fault.

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

I wish you good fortune in whatever avenue of life you assault with your presence.

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

It was a thrill to recreate with you, but now our association ends. You have brought nothing but pain, penury and strife into my days

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

And, after I dislodge and return your thong, I never want to see you again either

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

RT @smegacat: Remember that time you ran out of tobacco so you smoked your own pubic hair? #blackbooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

RT @Avenuewriter Add a drop of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange and pretend you're laughing at it. #BlackBooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

No! More details! Please? What time of year was it? What jumper were you wearing?

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Why does it have to be fancy? I just want sausage, mash and a bit of cake. Not twigs fried in honey, or a donkey in a coffin #blackbooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

RT @taycrazylor "The Key! The Key! It won't go in the thing!" "Bernard. You're using your finger." #blackbooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

What? They're like any holiday photographs. They're a bunch of people stood around squinting who didn't realise they were that fat

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Get on your knees. Put your hands on the floor. From where you are now to that far corner is our music section. #BlackBooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

RT @iExtract: "Brendan Blake turned from the window and patted Larry his barely hominoid, milk-fed gimp." #BlackBooks

[Carrie Proctor @Entorien]

"Don't eat muffins while I'm developing you." #BlackBooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

RT @15euro ah SKINHEADS! which one of you bitches wants to dance?

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Look at her... I bet she washes her hair in streams, and milks things... She's not even sweating! Has she not glands? #blackbooks

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

@freiheitdance Huh? What time is it?

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Nonsense, ur making this up, its like that fudge thing of yrs. What is it, u have to have lots of fudge because?" "IT STOPS ME GOING DEAF!"

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

I don't know its an impossible choice: walls, thermometer. I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me

[Bernard Black @BlackBooksDaily]

Ha! You're *toast*! T - O - E - A - - R - - S - - - T .... toe-oo-errst.... #blackbooks