Blake Beaver

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

I don’t appreciate the threatening tone…

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

So every Saturday morning, for as long as my son can remember, I’ve made pancakes from scratch in whatever obscure shape he wants. This kid decided to use his first grade opinion paper to drag my pancakes…

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ksnyd_10 Best thing I’ve seen all day. Congrats

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

My son just asked me if I’d rather be immortal or have a Nintendo switch…

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

Evan (singing to the Pokémon theme): oooooh you’re my best ho, in a world that we must hoooooooo.

Me: ummm, what was that?

Evan: well, actually you can use a ho in Minecraft to dig up all the ore…

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

I’m a big dummy who introduced my kindergartner to Pokémon go before a cold front and now I’m about to go outside in 37 degree weather to try to find a psyduck

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

My daughter asked me why I made a rubber band ball. I told her that I didn’t know, but I just liked doing it. I woke up to this. Her explanation was “I know you like doing it and now you get to do it again!”

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ConnieB07 For anyone wondering, that’s not a chipped tooth. He had just finished eating some blueberries

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ConnieB07

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ConnieB07 Ok a few things. 1) you didn’t use those tactics when you were a kid because you said you learned them when I beat you last time. 2) bear in mind this is her second time to ever play battleship

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

Annual watching of Muppet Christmas Carol and my daughter asks me if this really happened. I explained that it was a story by Charles Dickens and proceed to show her a picture of him. She looks confused and goes “... he’s not blue and hairy...”

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ConnieB07 @bmckin85 I’m not sure why I’m offended by this but I am

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@bmckin85 Good times. Fox if I respected my opponent. Jiggly Puff if I wanted to embarrass somebody

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ksnyd_10 I agree. Hogs got screwed

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@ksnyd_10

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@crowbarsnest Upgrading him from serviceable to above average

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@crowbarsnest This is honestly my first time to watch him play. Seems serviceable. #MFFL

[Blake Beaver @BlakeBeaver]

@Brewmeonit @crowbarsnest @sarinakeller Gonna pour out a $2 goblet of shiner tonight