Blue Ridge Parody

Parody and truth tellers of @BlueRidgeTV

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

.@SouthPark was spot on with our business model. #GoTeam! #GougeYouForEveryDollar #BlueRidgeTV

https://t.co/2YlpCCv6QV

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@MegaAdamjo Glad to hear it. We've added $20 in fees for a tech to maybe come out in the next month or two to tell you how it's your fault.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@joseph_lapp Our billing department is great, right? Enjoy our overpriced and limited services that may or may not work at certain times.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@129_BPM Beautiful. We love it. Enjoy!

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

You may have noticed constant blackouts with cable and Internet. It's to demonstrate the amazing abilities of our services. You're welcome.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@TheRealTomb6 We'd take offense, but then we remembered how much you're spending on our awesome service. You're our bitch. Enjoy!

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@jblan2029 We can't figure it out for the life of us. But we're glad to receive your hard earned money for our lack of caring.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@xmr13x Fantastic! You get a good night sleep and we get your hard earned money for it. Enjoy!

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@MarkKawate Who knows. We always have issues everywhere because our service is that awesome. Enjoy!

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@TheRealTomb6 Isn't our service awesome? Right when you need it, we yank it like a carpet beneath your feet. Enjoy!

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@ChrisHausman1 Look at the profile bio before making threats.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@ChrisHausman1 And we wish we could make more money off of you. Like the philosopher Jagger once said, "You can't always get what you want."

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@Condo34 Maybe. Maybe not. You never know what kind of shit we're ganna pull. Example: we just added hidden fees to your bill for asking.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@jblan2029 Isn't our service great? It's insanely fast and expensive, so we make more money off of you. Glad you're enjoying it.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

A @DSLReports user left us great feedback, so we charged him out the ass in overages and hidden fees. Check it out.

https://t.co/WHgUsBc7ZV

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@kull14 Absolutely! You're money means the world to us. We don't even have to treat you like a human being to get it. Isn't that great?

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@GuyGraybill We're glad to hear you love our service. Don't hesitate to call in and tell us all about it. #BecauseWeCare

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@DarrenWilsonGun We're glad to hear you love our services. You'll be glad to hear we love your money. Don't be late on your bill.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

We bought an ass load of wine for #NationalDrinkWineDay. We're all drunk. If you thought our support was bad before, wait till you call in.

[Blue Ridge Parody @BlueRidgeCable]

@kull14 We offer the finest batshit crazy services for astronomical prices. You won't find that at @comcast. Now fork over some more money.