Blue Acorn

The original eCommerce experts, and multiple layoff round executors (parody)

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Please note that we are the only @BlueAcorn account - all others are fake, regardless of verification status.

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

@Levin_Center @COVIDOversight @SBAgov @SBAOIG @womply @KabbageInc @UTexasMcCombs We ain’t do shit

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Which means you can expect the project to be done in 8-12 weeks at 2.5x the budget! 💸

[Blue Acorn iCi @blueacornici]

Starting July 1, 2023, Standard Universal Analytics will no longer process data. Not to worry, Blue Acorn iCi can implement #GA4 from start to finish in about 5-6 weeks. https://t.co/w5faII5E4K

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Happy Veteran’s Day, where all Blue Acorn employees are treated like Marines in science fiction movies and video games: Disposable and unremarkable, compared to the main character executives. 🫡

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

@BIueAcorn That’s a capital i - nice try. 😂

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Please note that we are the only @BlueAcorn account - all others are fake, regardless of verification status.

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

If there’s any one thing Blue Acorn is good at, it’s marketing!

[Blue Acorn iCi @blueacornici]

Marketing automation can be invaluable when done successfully and have irreparable implications when done poorly. Blue Acorn iCi VP of performance marketing, @ppcsearch_ninja, shares her top tips in @Klaviyo’s new guide to marketing automation. https://t.co/ZoEjvGVIDE

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

@AdobePartner @blueacornici @Infosys Don’t worry Adobe, you can always count on us to faithfully retweet and like your stuff even when nobody else will 🤗

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Welcome to the layoff life, Twitter and Facebook/Meta! There’s cake in the back!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Yes Blackbaud! Welcome the private equity money! And then the inevitable layoffs and thinning out! It happened to us and we turned out just fine-ish!

(This Post Brought to You by INFOSYS, World Best IT Firm Grade A+ 🏆)

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Kevin was truly ahead of his time, laying off significant headcount immediately after a period of rapid growth.

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Hey Liz, we could always use a third co-CEO!

Also, England is welcome to have Toby or Kevin!

[Liz Truss @trussliz]

I recognise however that, given the situation, I cannot deliver the mandate on which I was elected by the Conservative Party.

I have therefore spoken to His Majesty The King to notify him that I am resigning as Leader of the Conservative Party.

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

It’s been 2 years since we last heard from Kevin on Twitter. Big things must be happening with that Gantt chart!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

What Charleston needs is another taproom: Brew Acorn, where we serve beer to local disenfranchised former BA employees.

Additionally, it can serve an “Eichelburger” - a cheap hamburger laced with laxative. Seemingly good at first, but a real shitshow later!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

You act like having a co-CEO with a NFT as an avatar is a bad thing in this climate

Also, if any now-former Coinbase employees need a stable haven away from layoffs, Blue Acorn is hiring again!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Would somebody go heart Greg’s tweets, please?

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Happy #hump #day!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Don’t forget to set expiration dates on your holiday promo codes! #ecommerce

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

It is Monday# my dudes!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

Have a happy weekend everyone!

[Blue Acorn @BlueAcorn]

It’s been over a year since we joined the @Infosys family! Time sure flies by! #BlueAcorn #Infosys