Alan Evans

I was gifted to be born a BLUE, and therefore will enjoy our heavenly club, as others burn in Hells flames - RS

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

You can torch me anytime you want Lucy

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

How do you bring a sparkle to a man's eyes?

Shine a torch in his ear. 😆

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Lovely lips

[Sophie2078 @Sophie2078]

This energy? unavailable for stress, available for compliments only

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

@miraa_roxxy Yes

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Yes. Very

[Holly @h0llyzen_]

Am I cute?

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

What's your anger towards men Lucy Have you been rejected Surely not

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

Men deserve everything that's coming to them, and more! 🤣

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

@dillon43mary Poor mom

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

When in Turkey forger you're a vegan

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

When in Rome, do what the Romans do!

When in Vegas, do what the vegans do!

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Lovely knockers

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

And it is more healthy to shit on a news paper bending down as far as possible

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

For 100's of 1000's of years, men have pissed standing up; now, since the woke wankered have stuck their oar in, it's unhealthy, toxic masculinity using their vocabulary... 😆🤣🤣😂😆

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

You being an expert on mens heads should know the answer

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

If their big head could talk to their little head, do you think men would be more intelligent? 🤓

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

You don't need makeup Natural beauty is best

[Urwa @Herslays_]

This is me without any makeup
Do I look pretty ?

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Full of shit

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

Men who sit down to wee are .........................?

Please fill in the gap.

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Dick must have been pissed off with this story

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

We all know who it is... 😆

All the organs in the body were deciding who should be the boss.

"I should be in charge," said the brain, "I run all the body's systems; without me, nothing would happen."

"I should be in charge," said the heart, "I circulate oxygen and nutrients all over."

"No! I should be in charge," said the stomach, "I process the food that gives us energy."

"I should be in charge," said the legs, "without me, the body couldn't go anywhere."

"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "I allow the body to see where it goes."

"I should be in charge," said the anus, "I am responsible for waste removal."

All of the other body parts laughed at the anus and insulted him.

So he shut down.

Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the heart pumped toxic blood.

They all decided that the anus should be the boss.

What is the moral of the story?

Even though everybody else does all of the work, the ass hole is usually in charge.

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Says the girl with the elephant on her back earlier Glad you've recovered x

[Sophie2078 @Sophie2078]

The older you get, the more attractive “no drama and good sleep” becomes.

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Have you ever seen his Dave?

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

My boss hates it when I shorten his name to Dick...

Mostly, because his name is Dave.

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Happy birthday Aizal and may you have many more XxX

[Aizal @aizal_views]

I am from Russia 💚 today is my birthday

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Poor Dave Hope he recovered

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

Warning: Dark Humour Ahead...

"A cure for Dave?"

Dave is sitting in his doctor's office waiting for his test results.

Doc: Well, Dave. I'm sorry, but your tests say that you have a rare disease and it's 100% fatal.

Dave: Isn't there ANYTHING we can do to stop it?

Doc: Uh, there is this spa down the road that has these special medicinal mud baths. You can try that.

Dave: Will it cure me or at least give me more time??

Doc: No, but it WILL get you used to being covered in dirt.

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Sense or humour

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

My hubby and I share a sense of humour...

We have to because he doesn't have one

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

@TahiraS13553 Yes

[Alan Evans @Blueboy11Ali]

Hi

[Dasha @iim_dashaa]

why did u not say hi yet