Matthew Thomas

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

If any of my male British or Canadian friends want to propose and save me from this hell hole of a country, I’ll treat you so good. I’ll be the best wifey you can imagine.

[Beth McColl @imbethmccoll]

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

@instagram Except this isn’t the default view and reverts to the other bullshit all the time. It should be a setting you set once and never have to set again until you want to.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

If you or someone you know has been doing dry January and it’s been a real challenge, it’s time to take a real hard look at that relationship with alcohol.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

TikTok desperately needs a way to mute/block certain sounds and hashtags.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

My favorite brand of airport person is the guy who feels the need to do mobility exercises before his excruciatingly long 90 minute flight.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

If there are minimum age requirements for political roles, there should be maximum age requirements for those same roles.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Heartstopper is so good. I've been thinking about it all day and keep tearing up. Everyone watch it.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

I hate it when I see an ad for a product that is exactly what I need and solves a problem I didn’t even know I had and then when I go to purchase that item, it ends up being a kickstarter and won’t be available for months or even years.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Literally everyone says “no yeah” or “yeah no” it is not a Californian/midwesterner/New Yorker/etc thing please stop internet please!

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Childish joke, even more childish reaction

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Officially down 20 pounds since this time last year and down a little over 30 pounds since 2019. Feeling pretty neat about that.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

The effect Charles Gross saying “let’s talk about it” has on my blood pressure and overall mental well-being is…substantial.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Today’s wordle was some bs.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Are you an introvert or do you just hang out with some super draining people?

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

I know I’m gay gay but Doja Cat really makes a compelling argument.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Got lost in a winning-the-lottery fantasy and forgot that I haven't actually won the money yet. Again.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Man the ads on TikTok really skyrocketed overnight. Guess the end is nigh right? Just like ads and sponsored posts ruined Vine. Sigh.

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

@breezy__f__baby Chaos, blood, instability. So…uh…thoughts and prayers are welcome I guess 😳🤣

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

@PauICox @LewisJWilcox Nothing but bants for the lads

[Matthew Thomas @Bojangus]

Why do people say they're "humbled" when they get good news. Like...that's not right, right? You get "humbled" when something knocks you down a peg. Not when your hard work pays off? To be humble is a good thing. To be humbled isn't? Am I crazy?