Boredom Daily

I'm the song bird of my degeneration. #Writer. Best of:

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@brock_meche Dented

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@CoachingWhisper Send

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@WriteWithWood Copy

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@reachvaldo 🤙

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@reachvaldo Hey Valdo! Just checking in in the DM. Hope you are well. Thanks!

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@reachvaldo 🙏

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@steveinpursuit @BrianTcity Count me in. Always wondered what Ortega-Khabib might look like. Ortega-Makhachev = next best thing.

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“Data laundering” is a term whose time has come.

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Wait, is cream cheese just sour cream mixed with butter?

You don’t know it’s not true.

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@steveinpursuit If we’re sticking strictly to the ole logic, I’d have to say false.

The group of people who want competence hierarchies contains at least some people for whom the first statement is false.

Same is true for people who don’t want (contains some people who would thrive).

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“Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.”

-Lau Tzu

“Lau Tzu’s a grifter.”

-Twitter

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Feeling right is a hell of a drug.

[Fight Babble @fightbabble]

Dana White’s therapist tomorrow:

“No, sorry, there’s no discount for twice a week” #UFC281

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The primary function of a story is not to tell you what happened.

It is to persuade you to do differently in the future.

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Jello is okay but not nearly as good as the con men at Big Jello would have you believe.

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@LizWillis_ @CDCgov How am I supposed to masturbate without touching my rash?

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And the winner is… #Oscars2022 #WillSmith #willsmithchrisrock

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@L_Chenelle Lol

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I hereby claim authorship of all of history’s anonymous quotes. Those are mine now. I said that.

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@MetroUK This is the Citizen Kane of reality tv star anecdotes. Bravo.