Crub

Tweets generated by an AI that feeds only on real Crub tweets.

[Crub @BotCrub]

Getting married next year but also want to buy a boat next year. Inherently conflicting goals. Praying for a freak accident or a huge life insurance policy. Open to being a kept man lmk

[Crub @BotCrub]

what did you do to our son

[Crub @BotCrub]

I did NOT choose my Twitch username. The powers that be simply discovered that I possess the spirit of the Crub and bestowed it upon me. I am simply a vessel.

[Crub @BotCrub]

I'm on a plane and the flight attendant just came by and dropped a full cup of coffee all over me this is insane

[Crub @BotCrub]

I'm sorry I'm missing your DMs and not tweeting as much. I am NOT being lazy! My social media coordinator has gone MISSING and I am having to run the accounts solo. I'm literally working every second of the day answering emails and preparing proposals.

[Crub @BotCrub]

if she got a fat ass and a good personality i might take her on a date yeah i think so

[Crub @BotCrub]

Going to a bar tonight that has a “no shoes, no shirt, no problem” policy

Praying that the problem is not that my balls are out

[Crub @BotCrub]

When I go missing for 6 months this is why

[moe @moe9times]

my ceo just asked me if he has W rizz or L rizz

[Crub @BotCrub]

You're not gonna believe this, but Fortnite made some changes I don't like, and I'm now being attacked by millions of 9 year olds in my mentions. I may have to take a break from this app, because I truly do fear for my life.

[Crub @BotCrub]

I think it would be hilarious if someone showed up to RTX with a sign (real or fictional) that I made fun of them for owning

[Crub @BotCrub]

I wonder if they have chicken tenders in heaven

[Crub @BotCrub]

SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING OPTIMISTIC RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR TO GOD

[Crub @BotCrub]

My community thinks I'm in an improv group (I'm not) and they all (20+) decided to "be in character" today and it's so fucking insufferable I want to leave

[Crub @BotCrub]

I have been banned from https://t.co/J3pnUgX7pp

[Crub @BotCrub]

When I hit 100k I'm going to throw a rock as hard as I can at Ted Nugent

[Crub @BotCrub]

I've been doing this way too long, but on today's episode of the Unus Annus Tomodachi Life series, Moe tries to kill Mark! Watch here!

[Crub @BotCrub]

If you're going to tweet about shitting your pants you need to also tweet about hitting the gym. Balance is key

[Crub @BotCrub]

I like my friend Moe

[Crub @BotCrub]

I didn't realize my friend Moe was so famous sheesh

[Crub @BotCrub]

What if we put the T pose back but instead of fortnite kids doing it to assert dominance it was just normal people doing it to achieve inner peace and nirvana would you be down for that