egg

um im trying

[egg @BoxPens]

i guess we're all just trying our best

[egg @BoxPens]

I'd get nothing out of it, but feeling dissociated most of the time anyways, dream or real life, it just doesn't matter and it's about MY healing journey.

[egg @BoxPens]

I started anti-psychotic medicine a year ago today, and I have such vivid dreams that dig into my psyche, and it strangely has offered me some kind of resolution to stuff I could never get in real life

[egg @BoxPens]

a lot of people that do shitty things, don't realise they're doing shitty things, so what would be the point in - what I feel like is ME acting the fool, giving them what they want, through arguments or anger

[egg @BoxPens]

even though you know it might not be real, it feels real and it offers a brand new perspective on things and issues you might be going through

[egg @BoxPens]

something that i never see people talk about, people who also have other voices in their head, is the fact that sometimes it feels so good to talk to someone else and almost tennis racket thoughts back and forth until you almost have a conclusion

[egg @BoxPens]

relationships have never been easy for me but it's never stopped me from trying to meet someone that i can connect with

[egg @BoxPens]

i left work early yesterday and I walked across 3 fields, it was a lovely summer day and I was walking along some train tracks and somehow I ended up home. It was nice.

[egg @BoxPens]

when I lost my job I was thinking about selling nudes but to be honest I'm not that attractive or attention pulling so I'd never be able to do it and that kinda sucks

[egg @BoxPens]

I have a cat and she's lovely. It's important to remember the good little things about life.

[egg @BoxPens]

and maybe that's trauma or some deeper shit but I've never looked into it

[egg @BoxPens]

I remember when I was younger I felt so grown up and now I honestly feel like I've never known what the fuck has been going on

[egg @BoxPens]

it then feels performative when you try to talk about your problems, because everyone's going through problems, but if you're willing to listen to others then why can't they listen to you?

[egg @BoxPens]

sometimes it feels like no one takes you seriously unless you hurt others, even if you hurt yourself

[egg @BoxPens]

I lost my job recently because I'm a bit bat shit and I'm scared because I have no one but that's okay I guess

[egg @BoxPens]

who doesn't love clicking on an account and seeing mental ramblings I mean it must be pretty entertaining

[egg @BoxPens]

but tbh I might just be going a bit crazy but who the fuck knows and who the fuck cares

[egg @BoxPens]

and then shit gets bad

[egg @BoxPens]

and I think that not caring is an important thing to learn because you can care too much