The Boyfriend Police

The ridiculous, disastrous, and just plain funny stuff we love to hate about men.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

When you meet your girlfriend's friends for the first time DO NOT let her friends buy YOU a drink. #rude open wallet = open heart

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

If your girlfriend has siblings (especially younger ones) you need to take them out to dinner at least once.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Great friends will be there when you need them. Even if it's just a text to say how much your ex sucks and how much your hair rocks.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

If you have ever wondered why the eff an adult man can't buy himself a decent outfit, you are not alone. #cheap #allergictoshopping

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

@dani_somerville boyfriend stealing is so not cool.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

"I don't care about my birthday." -lies every guy tells

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Happy National Running Day to all the girls clocking in 7.0 on the treadmill at the gym while we're chilling on the Elliptical like a boss.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Every #humpday is a time to reflect on all the literal humping going on in your life.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Golden Rule of Shadiness: if you're worried about who he's texting or Facebooking, it's not you. It's him.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Kanye gets it. Girls need flowers regularly. RT @KimKardashian: Always making me feel special for no reason 🌹 http://t.co/Tl7LbZMNp0

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

That moment when you realize your boyfriend always wears those same shorts... because he has no other pairs. Introduce him to the MALL.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Guys that keep the TV on full blast when you're trying to sleep: rude. Guys who notice you passed out & turn it off w/o being asked: keep.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

I'm not sure if you know what that thing in the corner of the bedroom is. BUT IT'S THE HAMPER. #NationalBoyfriendDay

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Did you really just call your mom to ask her how to cook an artichoke? I'm standing RIGHT HERE. #NationalBoyfriendDay

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

On #NationalBoyfriendDay, we'd like to celebrate our imaginary boyfriend, Zac Efron.

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

It's #NationalBoyfriendDay, so just remember: If you don't have one, you get to take up the ENTIRE bed tonight!

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

"I don't generally date guys who live with their parents, #ButUGotThatiPhone5Tho so..." -Nobody ever

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

"I am not usually attracted to guys with criminal records, #ButUGotThatiPhone5Tho so..." -Nobody ever

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

Hey, @rayeesuh. Excellent taste in #FFs ;) Happy long weekend, everyone!

[The Boyfriend Police @BoyfriendPolice]

FORGET having important convos over Gchat or text. We all know men are too lazy to even type out full sentences. In person, please.