BrainFartsConduit

Puns. Glioblastoma. No one wants them. But they exist.

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What did the reindeer say to its friend when she wore a sexy outfit to the Christmas party?

Sleigh Queeeeeen!!

#christmaspun #reindeer #reindeerjoke

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What do fish say to each other when another fish dies?

R.I.P - Rest In Pisces

#fish #fishjoke #fishpun

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Laurene Powell recently attended the Kumbh Mela in India. How does she have so much free time?

I guess she's Job's-less

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Why was the patient with consumptive coagulopathy getting blocked by everyone?

Because he was sending DIC pics

(Like Disseminated Intravascular Coagulopathy)

#hematology #hematologyjoke #pun #joke
#medicalpun

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What is a corrupt politician’s favourite kind of pickle?

Bhrasht-achar

#picklepun #pun #joke #politicaljoke

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Bhagwan jo karte hain…. who bhale ke liye hi karte hain
But Waheguru jo karte hain, wo balle balle ke liye hi karte hain

#Punjabi #Punjabijoke #Sardar #Sardarjoke #Joke #Pun #Hindijoke #Hindipun

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Why do people who always write in upper case receive death sentences when they commit a crime?

BECAUSE THEY RECEIVE "CAPITAL" PUNISHMENT!!!
#wordplay #grammar #grammarpuns #puns

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Punjabi aadmi ka sabse favourite body part kya hai?

Uske Ghutne

Kyunki that's his Sardar-knee!!

#Hindijoke #punjabi #Punjabijoke

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What do you call 9 Punjabi people that are bad at their jobs?

Nau - Sikh - Ya

#punjabi #punjabijokes #sardarjokes

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What's the difference between Dura Mater and a gay orgy?

One is Meninges.
The other is Men in Jizz.

#gaypun #medicaljoke #medical #medicalpun #pun #gayjoke #meninges #cerebraljokes

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What would Vasco Da Gama be called if he were a Hindustani Classical Singer?

Vasco Da Ga Ma Pa Dha Ni Sa

#Vascodagama #Namepun #tiredofsearchingforhashtags

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

@CollinRugg Like a fat Ben Affleck

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Why are people living in different Galaxies considered racist by the Chinese?

Because they CONSTELLATIONS apart.

#Space #Spacejokes #astronaut #astronautjokes #NASA #spacepun

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

If a well endowed woman wrote an autobiography about her struggles with big boobs, what would it be called?

When Life gives you Melons

#Whenlifegivesyoulemons
#boobpuns

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What is the difference between a man without a son and a geologist impressing women with his knowledge on volcanoes?

One is लावारिस
The other is Lava Rizz

#pun #geology #volcano #lawaris

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What's the difference between people who go on a diet and Hitler?

One does a "juice cleanse" .....
The other does a "Jews cleanse"

#hitlerjokes #Hitlerpuns

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

Why are people who make spectacles, such Daredevils?

Because they're willing to go to any lens!

#spectacles #Glasses #dadjokes #puns

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What did the Kupffer cell say to the Hepatitis B Virus when it tried to attack the Hepatocytes?

"LIVER" Alone!!

#Liver #MedicalPun #KupfferCells #Pun #Medicaljokes #Gastroenterology

[BrainFartsConduit @BrainConduit]

What did the rodent say when he was accused of bad chewing style?

Yeah.... I gnaw