Maggie Brecker

I know I talk too much, I’m abrasive

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Duolingo is the Nintendogs of adulthood. I will not be taking any questions.

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

@FlyFrontier I have now canceled auto-renew three times. If I get charged again I’m suing. This simply must be illegal.

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

It’s alarming how many people think Cervantes is pronounced Ker-van-tees

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

A wasp flew down my dress this morning on the way to clinic. With this mf neckline. How.

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Things overheard that bring me joy:

“I’m a cowboys fan so all I’ve known is pain, but next year will be our year” -dude at coffee shop

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Wordle 212 2/6

⬛🟨⬛⬛🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
This will never happen again

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

I know way too many Texans who are like “I wish we had seasons” and then wear parkas when it gets below 60 degrees out

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

I refer to my morning alarm as my 7AM music and I sleep through it every day

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

They don’t make dog movies like they used to

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

There are some bugs that I’d rather break a leg than find in my apartment

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

TIL I’m astronomically more afraid of the cicadas and roaches on the running trail at night than potential thugs. Bout to pepper spray those MFs

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

I’m not crying.

[Nick Jr. @nickjr]

So about that time Steve went off to college… #BluesClues25

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

I just discovered that you have access to all of your SNP data on 23&Me so that's how I'll be procrastinating today

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Texans are silly because they’re so used to huge roads and plentiful parking that they have no concept of how big their cars are

[Marciano Lab @marciano_denise]

A big congrats to Isabel Lopez-Garcia on receiving an F31 NRSA grant! She is an amazing MD-PhD student, and I hope this will be the first of many grants in her future!

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

I absolutely judge people based on what web browser they use

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

no matter how many parasites/bugs I learn about I will still eat whatever someone puts in front of me

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Welp. Adult yik yak’s looking bleak.

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

Yet he will always be Spider-Man in my mind

[Maggie Brecker @BreckerMaggie]

My car insurance rep really struggled with the concept that I am indeed married AND I live alone