Brian Calzone

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

something I'm actually good at ;) RT @ProSexTips: Bad in bed? Sleep with 16 year olds, they don't know the difference.

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

just woke up. accidentally slipped myself ruffles that were meant for someone else #fml

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

found a nude of myself on my old Sidekick and thought I would share http://yfrog.com/ndimmpj

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

and because I'm not allowed within 20 feet of minors :(( #fml

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

my mom took me to Universal Studios today but I was pretty bummed that I had to leave because I wasn't tall enough to ride anything :( #fml

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

my leg is almost healed up from my failed date rape attempt last weekend. thankful my heartagram tat is still intact.

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

just wanted to let you guys know that @WAD is not only going to auto-tune our vocals but auto-tuning all guitar, bass and drum tracks :)

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

most recent pic of me and my girl http://yfrog.com/3twcubj

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

Every shitty band in Ocala is sucking my dick. If only I could get girls to. :(

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

I wanted to go to the studio today but my mom wouldn't let me. Just like the time she wouldn't let me kill my ex and myself.

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

decided to not use my Facebook or Xanga that much anymore so if you want to keep in touch, search for me on here: http://tinyurl.com/39cvdq8

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

I just pre-came in a 14 y.o. within 2 minutes of coitus. That's lengthy isn't it?

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

Can'y wait for @WAD to play the skatepark again. Although, I think a house show would have a better 14 y.o. girl turn out.

[Brian Calzone @BrianFuckzini]

I'm baaaaack...