Britney Montague

[Encyclopaedia Britannica @Britannica]

Thomas Jefferson re: Louisiana, 1803:

[𓂃⭑ayo | ➰ @aikenaye]

“Já leu a Odisseia?”
Já sim.

[Nadzeya @foulestench]

in sea of monsters, percy jackson completes the quests of the entire odyssey in like a week which took odysseus 20 years
i know my goat

[B. @buhlesrevenge]

i love the word "interesting" cause it's so chaotically neutral

[Mamello🧚🏽‍♀️ @MelloFelicia1]

Pleaaaaaaassseeeeee!!! I am begging! Use CANVA templates for your flyers! I cant take it anymore 😭

[Complex @Complex]

Doctors prescribed a 63 year-old woman 1.5 liters of Diet Coke a day after her Ozempic use contributed to a rare stomach mass.

Two days later, her pain was gone, and the blockage had completely dissolved no surgery required; Diet Coke pulled off the miracle.

[julia @juumelo_]

watching Lord of the Rings with someone is very intimate actually

[𐌕 🍂 @fwtimini]

Why don't pizza places give away those tiny little tables from the pizza boxes anymore? My dolls have to eat off the floor now, and it's bullshit.

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

I’ve had more peer pressure to use AI than I’ve ever had to use drugs.

[Lowkeyhurt @uhtriad]

Everyone thinks I’m an adult, but inside I’m like this

[UtterlyInteresting @UtterlyInterest]

Here is Roger Ebert's first paragraph of his review for "The Mummy" and it is why he was the greatest film critic to ever live

[ella 🕸 @loneliest_star]

okay he can be crazy in peace forever if he keeps this up

[Sofía @starkcanarie]

there hasn’t been a show this year that has made me feel what akotsk made me feel when baelor breakspear rode through the gate in the fog, with the got theme playing and announcing he would take ser duncan’s side. LET THE TRUE KNIGHTS TAKE THIS ONE

[Britney Montague @BritneyEsther11]

@Romy_Holland My best friend and mom mentor always told me, feed the baby, not the freezer.

[cinesthetic. @TheCinesthetic]

Happy 49th Birthday to Milo Ventimiglia! 🎉

One of the greatest line deliveries in television belongs to him.

[Lurkin' Mom @LurkAtHomeMom]

Why does everyone at the pharmacy have to go to lunch together?

[s mommy @thecavemommy]

The only positive to no epidural was I like…. Didn’t have to push…. He kind of just pushed himself out. I suddenly got this desire to push that was so so so bad that I felt like I was gonna explode if I didn’t, and suddenly there was a head, and like 3 pushes later he was out. It’s extremely painful, I will never ever stop talking about how painful birth is, because I feel like the “natural birth” crowd tends to talk about birth being a magical experience.

Like yeah sure you can do it but you’ll probably want to die the entire time, you will never experience anything that horribly awful again unless someone maybe stabs you and then twists the knife and then also lights you on fire at the same time

And yes I would do it again in a heartbeat

[ًluna @gwensgirlfriend]

I've watched this like seven times what an incredible tweet 😭😭

[Patience @pjharpy]

Everyone that skipped The Sheep Detectives in theaters missed out on the joy of openly weeping in a dark cool theater then emerging from that cocoon to dry out in the warmth of the sun