BryanExMachina

Business professional & content creator for a limited audience. Failed musician. Not part of any team. I am just as unpleasent in person as I am on the internet

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

It's not my fault you're stupid, but here you are, making it my problem.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Watching the Left defend Platner with some of the same fervor and language that the Right did for Trump is such delicious and depressing irony.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Down almost 20lbs over the last 3 months, and all I've done is track my caloric intake and I go for walks 6x a week.

It really doesn't have to be any harder than that for most people.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Flats > Drums

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

I may be old, but I'm still young enough to enjoy weighing myself before and after I poop.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

The cloud is just someone else's computer.

The left lane is for crime.

Shutting up is always an option.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

The new BA that started at my company today was born when I'd already been in the corporate world for a few years.

[PoIiMath @politicalmath]

At one point during the 2024 election cycle, Trump was promoting a massive "Great American Fair" for the 250th anniversary. He proposed the Iowa fairgrounds for it and promised each state their own pavilion

I was really excited about this idea. The 1893 World Fair (celebrating 400th anniversary of Columbus discovering America) was a massive event, years in the making. It's covered by history books.

I knew that 2 years was not really enough time to make something that tremendous happen, but I had hoped that Trump might push forward that vision and that some passionate people might bring it to fruition. I hoped to travel to it this summer with my kids.

What a wonder it would have been, to see each state proudly represent itself to have a grand event that brought us all together for a singular moment.

It's awful that such a grand idea has eroded into this sad display.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Friend: Are you excited that you're going to start traveling for work again?
Me: One of the places I'm going is fucking Cincinnati. No.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Her cleans are truly special, in rarified air not just in the metal space but all music. But where her real power lies, I think, is in her absolutely upper echelon vocal fry and gutteral low growl. If she can formulate a head voice scream like Courtney LaPlante... Jesus christ.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Maphra has a fucking generational voice.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

All these artists pulling out of the Great American State Fair, but I bet Trapt would take it on. The only challenge would be the singer would have to get coverage for their Applebee's shift. Nothing says "Happy Birthday, America!" like a set opening and closing with your divorced Dad's 18th favorite song "Headstrong"!

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

I am the least charismatic person I know, and my wife should feel a great amount of shame in her taste in men.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

I just randomly walked up to my front door at the exact same time as an Amazon delivery guy was putting a package on my front porch. We made super awkward eye contact, and he slowly backed away.

I'm just gonna throw myself directly i to the sun now.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

I wanted to yell out "No, I wasn't waiting for you like some freak, I just wanted to go outside!"

Did I? No. I just gave an awkward wave, which DEFINITELY made it look like I was waiting for him.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

@philthatremains Nice blue eye.

Now let's see the brown one.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

When I was growing up, you could flip mattresses over and they lasted 10-15 years before suggested replacement.

Now, you can't flip them and they suggest a new mattress every 5 to 8 years.

I hate it here.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

Every day is a good day for new music from A Perfect Circle.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

@philthatremains Sadly the MAGA base won't vote for him, certainly not without the blessing of their God king. It's a more hard-core version of the Clintons/Obamas giving their thumbs up/down on Democratic candidates.

[BryanExMachina @BryanExMachina]

@PenningWyse *sexy, they got sexy photos.

Congrats!!!