Bryan Pistorius

@UMichLaw | All views are my own. Retweets are not endorsements.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

Hey @HelloMinted thanks for sending me messed up holiday cards after paying extra for expedited shipping and then making me wait on hold for 5 hours today only to have your customer service rep cut out and not call me back. Maybe you should hire more people.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

Really think Northwestern is the only other win this Michigan team gets. Next week against Sparty will be rough… #GoBlue #Michigan

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

We have to wonder: will JJ play the 4th quarter at all this year? #GoBlue

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@3YearLetterman It’s HIPPPAAA Coach.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@PFF_College 11-1 I think Maryland is the trap game, but they come back from the that loss and beat OSU.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

It’s okay Buckeyes. Just remember Penn State is overrated and shouldn’t be ranked this high…
#Buckeyes #PennState #big10

[Michelle “Ari” @arimichelle24_7]

@VanRentalUSA you really made this a horrible holiday for us! #sadchristmas #company #Horrible #Really #badbusiness

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

Just trying to spend Christmas with my family and @VanRentalUSA just made that possibility less likely. #HomeForTheHolidays #Christmas #Christmas2021

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@VanRentalUSA why did you cancel the van rental I’ve had for almost two months just 3 days before I pick up the minivan for holiday travel? Seems like you should erase the “industry leader in van rentals” line from your customer service hold message. 🤷‍♂️

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@VanRentalUSA why did you cancel the van rental I’ve had for almost two months just 3 days before I pick up the minivan for holiday travel? Seems like you should erase the “industry leader in van rentals” line from your customer service hold message. 🤷‍♂️

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@TheAthletic @nickbaumgardner @TheAthleticCFB Good thing we’re a basketball school now.

[Dave Barry @rayadverb]

Here's my year in review. Don't shoot the messenger.
https://t.co/2egKDLnjiW

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

World, meet Beau.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

As a BYU fan, I wonder when BYU fans will finally learn that the only thing BYU football is undefeated at is giving us hope and then breaking our hearts. #BYU #BYUFOOTBALL

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

A game of inches... #BYU

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

Michigan will only win two games this year. #GoBlue #WISvsMICH

[Laurence Tribe 🇺🇦 ⚖️ @tribelaw]

A wealthy prince throws a huge party in his gaudy mansion during an epidemic for his asymptomatic friends while the peasants die. Then the virus shows up and tears through his fancy guests. Familiar? It’s the exact plot of Edgar Allan Poe’s 1842 classic, “Masque of the Red Death”

[Dan Rather @DanRather]

The fact that we are debating masks in a presidential debate is really everything you need to know about the sate of the nation.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

@worfosaur You told my wife you and your colleagues don’t wear masks in your break room, right? 🤔

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

Hoping @scottjshapiro finally decides which candidate to support after tonight’s presidential debate. Been waiting months for his decision.

[Bryan Pistorius @BryanPistorius]

I don’t know who needs to hear this (actually, I do), but just because you “may” do something doesn’t mean you “should” do that thing.