Calamity Grandma

Bow down to love.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

So glad I curled my hair and had it looking nice just for it to fall flat as soon as I walked outside. 🙄

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

“It’s hard to let your guard down when all you know is defense.”

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

According to two of my coworkers, if I was a cryptid, I would be the Squonk because I cry a lot. 😅

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Where you’ll never find me.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Down.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

I Don’t Wanna Be Me by Type O Negative is exactly how I feel rn.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Holding back tears so you don’t ruin your makeup is a skill we should be able to put on our resumes.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

I know I’ll never be pretty enough, but at least I am a good person.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

“Why are you shitting on everything I say and do today?”

“Because I have to poop.”

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

@GrimTrav_ Reminded me of this episode of the Office. But be safe please!

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

But what the fuck is wrong with me?

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

“A coma might feel better than this.”

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Is it weird to go see a movie by yourself? Because I’m debating it.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Was confused as to why I shiver after I cry and apparently it’s an actual thing

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Our intersection. Our divine collision.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

This grief will be the end of me.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Fall down, never get back up again.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

Thank you to whoever invented buttered toast.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

In desperate need of a nose job.

[Calamity Grandma @ButtxCramps]

This was the worst day of my whole life.

But Blaine drove 45 minutes right after he got off work just to be there for me. 💜