Chris Johnson

Attorney Criminal Law

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas Still waiting on that registration letter, oh mighty queen of selfies. Kids deserve better.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @FisherNews Still clutching that selfie stick like it’s the key to victory? Staff’s over it, kids aren’t buying the ‘blame them’ playbook. Pee wee football’s calling—don’t trip on the way out!

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CMershal @CoachHeas Oh no, you caught me! Preaching daily while hiding behind a fake name is totally my villain origin story. And a crush on the ‘selfie queen’? You’re right, my therapist says I need to unpack my obsession with people who can’t spell ‘you’re.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @FisherNews I’ll heckling you until you finally quit. @CoachVosburgh already retired, so it’s your turn now. Honestly, even I could’ve racked up three more wins with that team. Pack up your fragile ego and take it to a 5th-grade squad, where you belong, maybe!

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB @ERGFootball @SalWarriorsFTBL @CoachRicciFB the young men need to realize you won’t have their backs. You’re not a coach—you’re just a figurehead too scared to give input to @CoachHeas. There are way better programs out there. 3-7 this year. Both @CoachRicciFB and @CoachHeas blame the kids for every loss.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB @ERGFootball @SalWarriorsFTBL @CoachRicciFB I really hope not. The coaching staff at Fisher leaves a lot to be desired. A 3-7 record? Seriously? A few simple offensive changes could’ve easily turned three of those losses into wins. But no, you and @CoachHeas decided to stick with ‘horrible’ as the game plan.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachVosburgh, word on the street is you’re retiring. Makes total sense after the trainwreck of a year you’ve had. Honestly, @CoachHeas should pack his bags and join you on the way out. Talk about killing two birds with one stone.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CMershal @CoachHeas @FisherNews Thanks for the sermon, but the real disappointment is Selfie Queen. The kids give it their all, and he acts like they didn’t show up. When you are consistently losing winnable games, it falls on the coaching. This guy tears down the team when he should be owning his failures.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @FisherNews
Another selfie, this time with “blowing kisses”? When are you going to focus on the SJF football program instead of perfecting your selfie game? These kids grind all off-season, and their coach is busy posing for the camera. Truly inspirational.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @FisherNews Selfie Queen, your coaching skills are top-tier—top-tier terrible. Clearly, you have no clue what you’re doing. Let’s be real: three winnable games blown in a row? That’s on you. Time to step aside before you turn another season into a train wreck for these hard-working players.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @FisherNews Listen—your coaching style is lacking. Other coaches steer clear, the kids think you’re lost, and you wrap up with a 3-7 season. Seven losses and you blame the kids? Take responsibility. Three winnable games turned to 0-3. Consider a new career, photography, more your speed Pal!

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB Lost again? This is getting old, don’t you think so. Thank God the season is over. The kids deserve a lot better.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB Lost again? At what point do we swap QBs—when they’re throwing 4 INTs per game? 2 isn’t enough? Time ti move on coach. Kids played hard. Yet couldn’t coach to save your life.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB Lost again… So, when’s the QB change happening? When they hit 4 INTs per game? Just checking.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachRicciFB @FisherNews A 3-7 season with an average of 2 INTs per game and three blown, winnable games—impressive work. You and @CoachHeas should stick to taking selfies together because coaching clearly isn’t your calling.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @CoachVosburgh @FisherNews Well done, Selfie Queen—you’ve really outdone yourself this time. I caught the game, and wow, that play calling was a masterpiece of disaster. For the sake of the program, step down. Just a thought. 3-7 just wow!

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @CoachVosburgh @FisherNews Selfie queen, big week ahead. The kids might be ready, but are you? Another winnable game—try not to botch the play calling like in all your losses. I’ll be there to witness your coaching fiasco. I’ll be standing along the railing watching.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachHeas @CoachVosburgh @FisherNews Selfie queen. Winnable game ahead, but with you at the wheel, who knows? Odds aren’t in your favor. @CoachVosburgh should bench you, but he’s too caught in his time warp—Father Time’s got him pinned.

[Chris Johnson @CB4365]

@CoachVosburgh @CoachHeas @FisherNews
Selfie queen, offense is stuck again. Huge playbook, but only 5 plays? Defense delivers; your play calling doesn’t. Let the D coordinator handle it. Go coach your kids’ team—if they’ll have you.