Claire

I'm a FLOTUS in training.

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

It does not taste or act like milk get out of my life

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Almond milk needs to be cancelled what the actual f*ck

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Nobody warns you about the all poop alerts you're gonna get when you move to a costal town

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

@HP please tell me why it just took me 30 minutes to set up my printer and why I had to download a stupid app. Your user experience is AWFUL

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

@EdKrassen Why would you repost a terrorist group's propaganda? They CLEARLY want people to believe they are doing good. You are only making things worse by posting this - I'm honestly shocked you would as a journalist.

[Hillel Fuld @HilzFuld]

Let me say this in the clearest possible terms. If you’re concerned with Israel’s response, if you’re focused on the people of Gaza right now, you’re either ignorant or intentionally hypocritical.

2005: Israel handed Gaza over on a silver platter. No “occupation”, no Israeli presence, nothing. 100% theirs. If they wanted anything other than dead Jews, they had the chance.

In what world is it normal to demand a country provide water and electricity to its enemy when there is clear evidence that they are using those water pipes to create rockets that then kill Israelis?

You’re worried about the electricity and water in Gaza? You can provide it. Don’t want to? Then keep your mouth shut.

They have nowhere to go those poor Palestinians? Why don’t you go look at a map? They have a border with Egypt. Let them take them in if they care so much.

Oh, Egypt doesn’t want them? Did you hear that? That was my heart breaking for them. Egypt can take them. They don’t want them? Not my problem.

You’re worried about a disproportionate response by Israel? Kindly tell me what a proportionate response would look like.

Because if we did what they did to us, that would require the murder, abduction, and rape of over a thousand people.

Is that what you’re recommending Israel does? Because that’s pretty sick of you.

And once and for all, we need to unequivocally reject the false narrative of “They’re not all Hamas supporters so Israel has no right to attack Gaza.”

A- The Palestinian people elected Hamas. Make up your mind. If they’re a people who you believe deserve a state then it’s time you held them accountable as a people. They elected Hamas. They will pay for that tragic decision.

B- The Palestinian people, not 100, 1,000, or 10,000 of them, give out candies when innocent Jews are murdered. Have you seen thousands of Palestinians speaking out against Hamas? I haven’t. Where are they? Their silence is all I need to know.

C- In every war in the history of the world, innocent people die. That fact, as sad as it might be, has zero relevance to whether the war is justified or not. Need I remind you how many innocent Germans died in WWII? Israel is fighting Nazis now. Zero difference. In war, innocent people die.

D- And finally, don’t come at me with the whole “They can’t speak out. Hamas will kill them.”

Where have we heard that before? “I was just fulfilling orders. I had no choice.”

Oh yes, that was what the Nazis said. It was not a legit argument then and it’s not a legit argument now.

What Israel experienced on October 7th was the equivalent of 9/11 times 50. Israel WILL retaliate accordingly and it will not stop no matter how much you throw your double standard at us.

We not only have every right to do whatever we can to obliterate Hamas, we have a moral obligation to do so.

You might not know this now, but a world without Hamas is a safer world for you and your children.

If you didn’t complain when ISIS was defeated, if you think WWII was justified in order to defeat the Nazis, then you can either stand with Israel while we cleanse the world of Hamas savages or you can go ahead and keep your mouth shut while we do the work from which you will benefit.

If you have any integrity at all, go read the charters of Hamas and the PLO. If you’re honest, ask yourself what “From the river to the sea” means. Look at a map if you can’t figure it out. It means no Israel. Do you support that? Throwing all Israelis into the sea? Because that’s what that means.

If you are still delusional enough to think they want a state, go Google The Partition Plan. They had one. They rejected it. Then google how many times Israel offered them a state.

And if, after all that, you still think the Palestinian’s agenda is anything other than total genocide of the Jewish people, congratulations, you have earned the privilege of being named a flaming antisemite who supports murder and rape.

I’m sure your mother is proud. 🤮

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Thank you for your less than one week of support! I see you're back to your regularly scheduled "colonizer" programming. Have fun! Good bye!

[Hen Mazzig @HenMazzig]

Jews are an ethnic group who come from Israel.

This is proven by genealogical, historical and archaeological evidence.

Israel is not "a colonial state" and Israelis aren't "settlers." You cannot colonize the land your ancestors are from.

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

@Andy who let Luke go to the night club in neon green crocs??? And why are the women fighting over someone in neon green crocs!

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Are you not allowed to tweet if you don't upgrade

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

@Andy why did anyone let Luke go to the bar in neon green crocs. And why are women fighting over a man in Neon green crocs?? This is as bad as combat boots on the beach!!!

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

After 10+ years of trying to become twitter famous, I will be taking my talents elsewhere.🧵

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

The only people who can successfully digest dairy are the full whites, those with colonial blood. It's because it is improper to fart so the ones who couldn't handle the cheese cake were naturally selected out

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Still thinking about this

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

I love that Dunkin calls it "sweet cold foam" to make us white ladies think we aren't eating whipped cream for breakfast

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Quinoa could be the worst tasting food in the universe

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Why is there no lounge area in @BestBuy like there is in a women's clothing store? Like bitch get me some cucumber water and an over stuffed chair cause idgaf about screen resolution

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Like no rodan and fields, I have not purchased your over priced skin care since 2014 you do not need to send me marketing updates. GOODBYE

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

Someone invent an app where I can reply "never f***ing email me again" to companies to unsubscribe

[Claire @CLA__LALA]

When are we gonna solve the sneezing and peeing issue