CraigsList Personals

Actual posts from Rants & Raves, Missed Connections, and Personals on Craig's List.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

my penis is not small. it's FUN-sized!

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

please don't call the boner-police on me! i don't wanna go to jail!

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

my luv for u is like die-uh-re-uh: i can't spell it very well.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

i haven't heard anything on Kony lately. So anyway... wanna go out sometime?

[Alien Guy @AlienGuyParody]

Prostate Exam = alien anal probe

[Matt Mann @MannMath]

I would totally do her (homework).

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

rim-job sounds like a basketball term LOL!

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

RT @skeyoh "I like my women how I like my marshmallows: hot and black, and between two crackers."

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

. @Olympics i could poll-vault with my penis

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

and the dismount! #Olympics #sex

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Please open the door. I have flours.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

nice to meat you

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

I'd take home the gold in Loving You. #Olympics

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

i'm competing in synchronized boners #Olympics

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

I have 8008135 sperm.

[Matt Mann @MannMath]

My lucky number is 8008135.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

Wanna see my pet poison-dart frog? He was a rescue.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

i have a fetish for crazy cat ladies

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

My only crime is being addicted to love. Well, that, and drugs. But mostly love.

[CraigsList Personals @CL_Personals]

Your Anus is my favorite planet.