CPT Students

Soon to be CPT's #1 entertainment spot for students. Keeping you informed about up-coming events, student deals and jobs in CPT.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Why is the day that you do laundry, cook, clean, iron and so on, called a day off?

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Bill Cosby loves pudding... Pudding his dick where it don't belong.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

I’ve probably wasted a solid year of my life just staring into the fridge.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

*Bumps into your crush*
You: Oh, I'm sorry... Almost fell in love right there.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

The road to success is always under construction.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Boy: You remind me of my pinky toe
Girl: Why?
Boy: Cause I'll probably end up banging you on the coffee table

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Why is there so much blood in my alcohol system?

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Children in the back seats of cars cause accidents, but accidents in the back seats of cars cause children.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Saying you are dumped but we can still be friends is like saying the dog died but let's take it for a walk anyway.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Was Barry White? Was Clint Black? Was George Strait? Was Marvin Gay? Sure made Stevie Wonder!

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

TRUE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into a persons house and your wifi connects automatically.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Sometimes... when you cry ... no one sees your tears... sometimes... when you are happy... no one sees your smile... But fart just one...

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

When wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body....men are so polite they only look at the covered parts

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

Last night I had a dream that I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up, my pillow was gone.

[CPT Students @CPTStudents]

I swear to drunk I'm not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don't do vegetables.