CVself

The last resume you’ll ever need.

[CVself @CV_self]

Drop your duck names in comments 👀

[CVself @CV_self]

Would you hire me if I was a worm

[CVself @CV_self]

A job interview is basically a conversation between two liars 😏

[CVself @CV_self]

bro you are not poor, you are the owner of 6 million dollars 💸

[CVself @CV_self]

Many of you might not agree but this is how peak career trajectory looks like

[CVself @CV_self]

Enjoy your unemployed days. you’ll miss them more than you think ✨

[CVself @CV_self]

someone please take LinkedIn away from me, I just viewed someone’s profile at 3am and they have LinkedIn Premium

[CVself @CV_self]

Me on indeed applying for both prison security guard and childrens hip hop dance teacher jobs cuz man idk what I wanna do

[CVself @CV_self]

my dream job?? being unemployed and rich

[CVself @CV_self]

Now when love island is over, when are we starting Job island? 👀 it’s like love island but instead of finding love you find a JOB 💕

[CVself @CV_self]

When the job I applied for actually calls back and says I’m hired…

[CVself @CV_self]

Job hunting : also known as the process of slowly lowering my standards 🙌🏻

[CVself @CV_self]

From dev to Dave…

[CVself @CV_self]

Unfortunately my brain doesn’t know the difference between a job interview and being held at gunpoint… 💀

[CVself @CV_self]

The worst part about looking for a job is that I don’t even want one 💀

[CVself @CV_self]

Can’t fix your life. Can fix your resume. 💚 https://t.co/1saYKZ2zCh

[CVself @CV_self]

At least tears are free ✨

[CVself @CV_self]

🗿

[CVself @CV_self]

Applying for jobs in 2025 like:
📎 Please attach resume
📎 Please attach soul
📎 Please attach 17 years of experience under the age of 25

[CVself @CV_self]

Your resume is the ✨ dating profile ✨ of your career.
Make it hot 😉