Cait Teegarden

Somehow, heartbreak feels good in a place like this.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

I can’t believe the extent to which I’m asked to maintain my human mouth. Take care of EVERY tooth??

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@missmollymary it’s grotesque and I love it

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

Currently waiting in line alone at Yankee Stadium, working up confidence to verbally order the “Grub Tub Combo”

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@emilyjwils 🚮

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

My dad calls me. I obviously prepare for death, devastation, etc.

Turns out he wants the bobble head doll that will be given out to the first 18,000 attendees at the Yankees game on April 14th.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

you know we don’t have to say “feeling the pain at the pump” right?

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@bbybluray top 3 least favorite chores

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@atnicolejames When in doubt, identify the father.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@atnicolejames namaSTINK

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

Motion to nationally mandate a webinar for normal behavior on airplanes.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@RachelARich you’ve got property, you aren’t innocent

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@RachelARich I’m en route to LA, I’m certain she’s one of yours.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

The man next to me keeps setting an iphone alarm for 31 minutes (full volume alert) to seemingly remind himself to clear his throat and yawn (also full volume).

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

A flight attendant just alerted this person that, no…

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

is it helpful to come on this website every 24 days to post one singular thought

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@missmollymary oh you mean it’s not restful to have a random person from middle school measure your foot for custom ski boots made of cheese?

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

@missmollymary I too am afflicted by Unsettling Dream Syndrome. Not nightmares. Not stress dreams.

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

Help, I just scanned a QR code on a bag of chips after being prompted:

“Need Dip-Spiration?”

[Cait Teegarden @Cait_Who]

The confidence of a congressperson with a RIDICULOUS last name. I could never.