CalebNoCaptainCaleb

I used to be a nerd but now its time for revenge

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

If the eyes are the window to the soul the zippers the window to the pants

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Just got an album signed by John Lennon #suckit

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Just a warning to everyone younger

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

#sexiestmanalive

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Right when you think you have life figured out......you shart

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

I say wear what you want to wear......unless that's jeggings then you're just being an asshole

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Tonight rat poison for dinner
Pull the cord from the phone
I am dining alone

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Got chased by a vicious racoon last night #livinglavidaloca

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Just met Johnny Knoxville

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Seeing Willie Nelson tomorrow #bigwillie

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

#dedication

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

@ustinHeim I'd play with those orange balls

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

This 18 hour time change is a little harder to deal with then I thought

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Truest thing I've seen in a long time

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

If people assume I'm an asshole I don't want to ruin their expectations

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

Hmmm I didn't know that about myself

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

I could talk less but once I get going I get too lazy to stop

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

I've bowled 2 weeks in a row....what has my life come to

[CalebNoCaptainCaleb @CalebSweatshirt]

You only get one flavor do not miss your chance to snack