HandsareEforEveryone

🫥

[HandsareEforEveryone @CaptHook184]

Me getting called in to reset a fire alarm

[Alex Armoury || Comms open (0/1) @AlexArmoury]

Or someone accidentally triggering the alarm so you gotta reset it

[𝓚𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓕𝓲𝓰𝓰𝔂 👹🩸 @ChampFiggy]

I love the new grounded rule. No more playing the rules beautiful finish.🔥🔥🔥

[trash jones @jzux]

having divorced parents as an adult is funny because you and your siblings are like damn who has custody of mom today

[🔎Al🔍 @SweatieAngle]

If your baby is ugly I am going to vape on it a little bit

[lexiiiiiiiiiiiii @blondspit]

Nobody remembers what your job title is but they will remember how hot your wife is

[milk @milkinhisbag]

AI could never steal company time the way i do

[Chris @citehchris]

why is smoking the only addictions jobs give you breaks to do? i should get 15
minutes every hour to cook up some parlays

[JT @jiratickets]

IT employees when you submit a ticket after you messaged them for help and they told you to submit a ticket

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

unfortunately i have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man

[Thrilla the Gorilla @ThrillaRilla369]

I now understand why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour

[ol’ stocky ⛳️ @oldstocky]

The last registered duel in Argentina, 1968

[Dudes Posting Their W’s @DudespostingWs]

No lies detected

[Darth Powell @VladTheInflator]

No one panicked when the federal reserve artificially inflated home prices until young families couldnt afford shelter.

Weird isn't it

[Earl Smith @EarlBSmith20]

I would not have believed you if you told me in 2023 that Bill Belichick and AJ Ferrari are both at UNC in 2025.

[Steph @Steph93065]

@unusual_whales Perspective

[bumbadum @bumbadum14]

I am 24, I don't care about 401Ks.

I am still paying off my 10,000 dollar car that I had to buy at a 12% interest rate becuase Biden hiked the rates and "first time buyer" rates.

I have a 250 a month insurance payment because you let 100 million illegal immigrants drive without liscenses.

My rent is nearly 2k a month because you made it illegal to build and imported millions of foreigners to replace me.

[Merle Faggard @dumpthebosses]

Dude cigarettes are fun cause you get to go walk around outside

[John Coogan @johncoogan]

Tariffs up 50%. Stocks down 5%.

You know what hasn’t changed?

What benching 225 for reps feels like.

Time to visit the church of iron boys.