Captain Scottty

Excellent speller. Quality flosser (no point now). Professional blojangler on @JeffONeilShow.

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Monday.
Tuesday.
Wednesday.
Thursday.
Friday.
FRITTERday!
#SunsOutFrittersOut
#ItsTheAppleFritterOfMyEye
#FritteringAwayMySaturday

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

“The Beer Fairy” is already knee deep into the gift of giving!
#HaveBeerWillDeliver
#BrewskisForTheCrewskis
#KnockKnockGlugGlug

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Dear @DeltaOptimist, how in the heck did I NOT make this list?!
1. I’m pretty sure I paid my taxes 2-3 years ago!
2. I regularly hand beers & smokes to our paper kid!
3. The Girl Guides clean up weekly with all my empties!
#WhyMoreDoINeedToDo
#ClearlyImOneOfDeltasFinest

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Come on by! If you know the “special knock” there just might be an extra special treat for the adults (or shifty looking teenagers with bad moustaches)!
#HappyHoppyHalloween
#HappyHardBarHalloween
#IThinkIHearTheCopsComing

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Gourd on Gord crime!
#PumpkinPatch2023
#MrPumpkinHead
#MyFirstNameIsGordon

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

A belated birthday present for myself:

CHEWCROCCAS!
#ScottsNowHauteCouture
#ChewcroccasWithNoSockas
#CrocsAndShortsAllWinterLong

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

How can you tell someone went to @GunsNRoses last week but got their super early to see the full set by @AliceInChains AND got their setlist AND a pick from thee freakin’ Jerry Cantrell?!
Bringo!!!

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Birthday Starter Pack!
#LovelyCards
#LovelyWine
#LovelyChunkOMeat

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

The “C” stands for baCon!
#CaptainbaCon
#HuggyBearsGotTheC
#CanIStillEatThisC

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

One year ago today we lost our wonderful Granny Doreen. Not a day goes by that we don’t think about her & we all miss her dearly.
This photo was from her 105th birthday in 2020 surrounded by those that loved her including grandkids & great grandkids.
#WeMissYouGranny

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

🎤Experience Regina!🎤

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Finally got the roommates to watch “The Goonies”. My job as a parent is now officially done. If anyone needs me, I’ll be at Bingo.
#ProllyGonnaStartAParentingPodcast
#TheGooniesFTW
#OneEyedWillyIsMyHero

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Somebody got themselves some new Star Wars threads & are now ready for the runways of Milan, New York, & Burquitlam!
#MyBlueSteelNeedsSomeWork
#BigUpsToBurquitlamFashionWeek
#SashayShante

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Area man kayaks towards Sturgeon Super Moon.
Never gets there.
#KayakingFacts
#SuperMoonsAreCool
#BeautifulBC

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

We brought the @cfoxvan “Chuckle Hut” to English Bay to “host” the @CelebOfLight!
Where’s the swear jar?!
#DaFireworks
#DoWeGetMondayOff
#300000OfMyClosestFriends

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

This is our landline we bought in 2015.
I recorded this Greeting back then (I have no recollection doing so). It’s never been changed even though my lady friend keeps asking me to. Now I know why.
#ThisIsWhatIBringToTheRelationship
#PhoneHumourIsSoHotRightNow
#DaddyWhatsALandline

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Team Scott @ The World Paddleboard Championships in Tofino (some of this statement is true).
#CurrentlyStandingInLastPlace
#LifesAMackenzieBeach
#wasSUP

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

My nephew eclipsing my high school football achievements by about 12005%. Way to go Morgie!

[Morgan MacCubbin Lowrey @MorganMaccubbi3]

Had an awesome experience at the 2023 Canada cup,extremely proud to represent my province. Proud to say I won offensive player of the game and was named a Captain for team BC🧡🖤

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

Puttin’ the “hot” into “Hot Dog Beach Leg Brag Summer Vacation” photo thingy!
#IfYouGotItCoverItInSunscreenNSand
#HotDogLegsAreSoHawtRightNow
#ImAtTheBeach

[Captain Scottty @CaptScottty]

FREE ADVICE: The next time you’re about to be interviewed on the news (and/or featured on Crimestoppers) you may want to shave/shower/comb/cut/hide your hair beforehand!
Just sayin’.
#FreeMediaTrainingFromMe
#BadHairAndTheySpellYerNameWrong
#NoFaceForRadioJokesPlease