Goon Squad

GOOFUS MCDOOF SENDS HIS REGARDS!!!

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Me when I meet the Gilgo beach killer

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Hey girl, Let’s see that bush!!! JENNA BUSH!!!!

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

@MelGlbsonFan82 “Mel Gibson fan”😭😭😭

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Secret service agent cums in his girl call that negligent discharge

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

John Lennons assassin would have got me cause I’m a NOSY motherfucker

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

SUPERBOWL SUNDAY WINGS??? TOILET BOWL MONDAY WINGS!!!

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Breaking: the man who tried to break Luigi Mangione has been arrested and identified as the infamous “Ravioli manicotti”

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

This is ridiculous

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Sinking on a boat and yelling “where the fuck is all this water coming from?!?”

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Gonna dive into a tank of vodka like Scrooge McDuck after this month is over

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Hey pal, take a picture it’ll last longer

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Anytime someone says “well this is how we do it in our house” you know their assholes

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Touched my balls 25 minutes ago and my hand still smells

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

The bunny from hoodwinked overdosed on a curb in Hollywood

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Dropping off pumpkin pies at a safe haven baby box

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Trying to figure out my own PEMDAS right now

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

No one dressed as cunty as cumala whoreass

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

flat earthers.

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Making Patrick and squidward fuck in my SpongeBob kraft mac and cheese

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

Got my balls caught in a resealable bag of Tyson anytizers

[Goon Squad @CaptainGooney]

I have to be on sesame street in under 25 minutes and still NO ONE has told me how to get there.