Dick Ellington

Navigating uncharted waters in the never-ending search for greatness and fabulosity....

[Catturd ™ @catturd2]

I love it when 400 private jets fly to Egypt for the UN Climate Conference to tell the peasants to ride bikes and live in tents.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

Haven't been here in 3 years but I keep hearing Twitter was bought by the world's richest man. Seriously? Warren Buffett is still alive?

[FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud]

Do people who go ice fishing know you can actually make your own ice?

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@skickwriter @SaltyCorpse I would RT this but my mouth is full of pure breast meat and crispy skin. #KFCwingsandbreastmealLOL

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@tenacious_tiph After being on twitter just about six months and a couple of years I think this is still my favorite tweet of all time. And now I'm craving KFC. Fuck.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

Absolutely drop dead gorgeous!

[Sam G @ItsSamG]

So we done here, or what??

*gestures to work and everything else that requires adult-like responsibilities today*

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@W0nderW0manW0w I like it.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

I'm still a newbie on twitter but I remember the day I joined and the first person I ever followed was @TRHLofficial You go girl.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@thisonegirlamy What is it Clarice? Tell me about the lambs...

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@ADDiane Trust me there is. I have a smart person job that pays a lot of money so I rip new assholes during the day but when I get done with the day I start drinking and smoke cigarettes til I pass out like a moron. Fun times.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@agentattitude96 What do Buddy Holly, the Rolling Stones and the Grateful Dead have in common? The song Not Fade Away. https://t.co/RhxLR1jcjO

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@CReamTalk Dude I don't know why you don't run your own bigfoot investigations. If there is one thing I will shame Humboldt County people for it's NOT finding bigfoot. #hesinyourbackyard

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@CReamTalk why didn't you DM this to me? I fuckin' missed the deadline.

[Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco]

Hurry up Bigfoot Excursion almost full the experience of a lifetime..call Morgan at 702 374 3735

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@Luminousoul_ Golly gosh, I agree.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@omfgspaghetti LOL

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@SnarkyMommy78 @GGraphicsinc That is one thing I love about my life, I am not a parent. And therefore I never tell anyone else how to be a good one. I take care of my cat and that's about it.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@robertwmaxwell I'm a white, pudgy, middle class white guy and I'll never forget several years ago I wore striped sweat pants to a friends house and late into the night he drunkenly said, "Dickie, you look like a Russian gangster!" I took it as a compliment.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@bleedcrimson40 @DivinaDeeMe I used to love baseball all my life when my team had never won but then the SF Giants won in 2010, 2012 and 2014 and to be honest ever since then I couldn't give a rip. I can't explain it.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@TenaciousTess Gosh fuckit.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@QueeniesBack666 The ability to undress myself with my eyes.

[Dick Ellington @Captain_Dickie]

@TRHLofficial Josie, I hear you. The thought of children being stranded on ice caps is absolutely disheartening to me.