Carl

My Tweets are uncredible.

[Carl @Carlitus]

#caainfo Can you go over what grades are at what campus and for how long? Are all kids going to be at the stampede grounds at some point?

[Carl @Carlitus]

how do I post a Facebook status that Facebook is down??

[Tattoo You @MadeByTattooYou]

We have a coupon code for 30% off orders of $15 or more. Just use sale30 at https://t.co/eycxDbik3t

[Tattoo You @MadeByTattooYou]

Make cool designs when you combine multiple temp tats. This is Tim Beck's moth. 2 for $5 at https://t.co/MAyAe7BE4b

[Carl @Carlitus]

I'm a case of baskets.

[Carl @Carlitus]

They said I was crazy at the university. It is not I who am crazy, it is I who am MAD!

[Tattoo You @MadeByTattooYou]

Our online shop is finally open! Check out http://t.co/HedoGOHYC2 and let us know what you think!

[Carl @Carlitus]

SOPA really missed an opportunity with their name. Swap the P and A and you're on your way to a cleaner internet.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Kim Jong ill? Kim Jong Dead.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Maybe Apple's next product should be Apple Bees.

[Carl @Carlitus]

No Miners.

[Carl @Carlitus]

My dogs' breath = every single horrible smell in one place at one time.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Man, my stachios are pissed!

[Carl @Carlitus]

The Calgary Tower is still the tallest building in my heart.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Sex Is No Accident: http://t.co/wR9aF36
Awesome ads!

[Carl @Carlitus]

Infographic of the Day: 14 Surprising Facts About Beer | Co.Design http://t.co/2aPkfy4

[Carl @Carlitus]

Ah crap, I look like Donny Wahlberg.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Nothing quite like a projectile baby poop at 11:30 on a Saturday night. Sublime.

[Carl @Carlitus]

Cha-Ching! My baby's a Dijon mustard factory!

[Carl @Carlitus]

Wow, my new Dad-beard makes me drive like an asshole.