Carl Xavier

The Intern

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Love seeing a moth to a flame when the flame is a 200lb white woman

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Congress the Band WE are inside you #inshalah

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Travis Kelce is a bitch idc

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

I think I miss my wife

[D J @TxForever]

Insane blunt rotation at #UFC329

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

European immigration problem looking pretty real in the Frankfurt airport. P.U. #onionboy

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Wife asked to see to see the BV #ohboy #whoops @KnuckMcChuck

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

@BigButchMcGee Tecate is biblical grit

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Wife talmbout sum “let’s go crazy” at dinner but I just paid for the cab here with an empty snickers wrapper

[Saul “Bar Piss” Goodman @voddysodas]

Sorry, I can’t hear u over our freedom #america runs on womps #haveaday

[John “Teenus” Remington @zynaftersex]

45 days until Bid Day.

#hungry.

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Do all the pretty Italian girls just move to the US?

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

@sluttyyyelllaaa @smokeymcburnn Probably talks shit on the “free Israel” in your bio

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

“Intoxicated passengers may not board the flight” cried the radical left

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Hope the chick next to me on this flight has a nose plug I ran out of showers for July

[Jules “Hairy” Armpits @iraqismoker2]

23 years ago today Kobe Bryant refused to take no for an answer in a Colorado hotel room. #MambaMentality 🔥🔥🔥

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

@6RandyLahey9 @DonkeyHack I’m soaked and wet

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Snapchat will do this then hit you with the most gut wrenching memory that you haven’t thought about in months

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

Europeans here for the World Cup silently freaking out about all the black TSA agents is unbelievably funny

[Carl Xavier @Carlxavier_]

“Dude it’s like literally not even that much bro” #superphag

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

In the future, a trillion times a trillion dollars will be spent on making antimatter to travel to other star systems