CARM

🖤❤️💛🤍♌️

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

We all act and speak out of our own each individual lived experiences and belief systems.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

We Never Learn What It Means To Be Human.

Human Truths:

1. Two things can be true at once: someone can be mean when they feel threatened and also have a kind side. Someone can be very selfish at times, and be quite generous at other times. Rarely are people all good or all bad.

2. None of us have it figured out: we don't know what we're doing. We're all doing the best we can based on what we know. Even the people you think have it figured out, don't.

3. We've all hurt people: sometimes unintentionally. We've all done things we regret. Human perfection is an illusion.

4. It's rarely personal: most of our behaviors are survival based: our brain and nervous system have one core motivation, to survive. Our behaviors reflect our past adaptations and internal emotional state.

5. We're incredibly resilient: human beings are gifted adapters. In any environment and will learn quickly (subconsciously) learn to survive. Use this to your advantage.

6. We can do so much more than we think: we're conditioned to see ourselves as less than capable, but the human spirit transcends limitation. It's typically our mind and core beliefs that hold us back from the truth of who we are.

7. We all have blind spots: thanks to our ego, we all have parts of ourselves we can't see. We're more fragile emotionally than we like to admit, and that's ok.

8. When we're threatened, we go into defense mode: picture a scared, dog cornered. They growl and bark signaling "don't come near me." Humans do the same thing when we feel threatened. We deflect, defend, push people away, and shut down.

9. We all want to belong: our core need at birth is attachment. We are born to belong. We all want to find places where we are seen and valued. Without it we easily display signs of "mental illness."

10. The more we fear vulnerability, the more 'tough' we want to appear: bypassing pain, trauma, or wanting to appear strong comes from learning that vulnerability is a weakness.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

I left my body because I grew up in a chaotic home without an emotionally connected adult. I have almost no childhood memories. I stayed up at night anxious that someone might break in. Anxiety is a symptom of not feeling safe and memories form in safety.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Our triggers are our own responsibility.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to let people hit their own rock bottom. Humans are more resilient that we know, and sometimes our version of helping (which is usually well intended) actually keeps people stuck.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Bonding through complaining isn’t connection.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Signs you’re healing: you accept when people are committed to misunderstanding you and take it less personally.

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

💯☕️

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

Be mindful about what your harboring in that nasula of yours….. in that chante of yours… in that nagi of yours… and that takuye of yours…🤌🏽

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

Malakotaaa kstooo✨☕️

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

I had a reviving weekend. Blessed with sooo many relatives from back home or from far who came thru to the USD 49th annual Wacipi. 😋 #Malakota #Sicanmagu #Winyan #Indigenous

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

Amazing dancers, leaders, singers. Man I appreciate women of all ages who are such strong leaders in Indian Country! ✨🥳🙌🏽

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

Frank Pommersheim a legend! As well as more legends! Butch Felix! Delphine Red Shirt and Megan Red Shirt Shaw! 💯😭 wow! #USD #NativeAlumni #Law #Author #Stanford #Harvard #SGU #RST #Education

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

Ain’t he a great one? 💖😇 This man knows all my humor, accountability, high expectations, and is the most kind calm and caring human on earth….🥰🙏🏽

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Unresolved trauma reveals itself in romantic relationships.

Lots of people feel fine alone, or great with close friends— then they get in a romantic relationships and all their wounds show up.

They can’t have a conversation without an explosion or shutting down.

They are intensely jealous and controlling parts of them show up.

They appease their partner and don’t voice their issues because they fear being abandoned.

Unresolved trauma shows up in these relationships so we can finally heal it.

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

I am always inspired by women, especially Indigenous women! A big part of this inspiration comes from being a little sister to 4 older sisters, AND growing up with a single parent of a father. So the absence of a mother, has disciplined me to be grateful for women in my path!💯

[CARM @CarmShouldis]

You’re responsible and only one in control of your own body.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

I see a lot of social media posts saying your nervous system will be at peace when you’re with the right person.

This isn’t true.

There isn’t a magical person who will keep your nervous system regulated.

Your nervous system will go into fight or flight any time core emotional wounds from childhood are triggered— regardless of who your partner is.

Especially during conflict.

The nervous system is habitual and autonomic. It responds to the subconscious past, not just the person in front of you in the present.

The work is learning how to witness it, cope in healthy ways, and be kind to yourself in the process.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

I see a lot of social media posts saying your nervous system will be at peace when you’re with the right person.

This isn’t true.

There isn’t a magical person who will keep your nervous system regulated.

Your nervous system will go into fight or flight any time core emotional wounds from childhood are triggered— regardless of who your partner is.

Especially during conflict.

The nervous system is habitual and autonomic. It responds to the subconscious past, not just the person in front of you in the present.

The work is learning how to witness it, cope in healthy ways, and be kind to yourself in the process.

[Dwayne Reed @TeachMrReed]

Fund schools and after school programs, then watch the crime and poverty rates go down. Invest in the community. It’s simple.

[Dwayne Reed @TeachMrReed]

Kids long for the adults in their life to be firm, but fair. They desire dependable discipline.

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

The quality of your life has everything to do with your closest relationships. Have you built relationships where you can: have boundaries, say no, and fully express yourself without fear? Do your relationships support you in becoming the best version of yourself? If they don't, it's time to evaluate and re-build.