Caspary

«If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.»

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@RealMatiangi I did not expect a crop-and-paste "analogue" signature passed off as an "e-signature" in 2026.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@RodgersKipembe If Gachagua is the political mastermind we think he is, why can't he see she's a mole? Must she wear a "MOLE" sign on her forehead?

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Can't blame her; blame the voters for not voting right or using their recall power.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Quoting God to celebrate an election victory while allegations of crimes against humanity hang over you is a bold strategy. Just imagine what if He just found time to check out those allegations.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@ivymuthe Total 100,000.00. This is expected when you entrust AI with calculations and inadvertently let it know you are drunk.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@ivymuthe The logic is spectacular: 30 pairs of socks + 20 handkerchiefs = "gay." Wiping your ass with leaves = "savage." Heaven forbid being seen buying Arimi's milking jelly to grease ball bearings.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Yes, we unite against common enemies, and Kenya's Public Enemy No. 1 has already been identified. By 11 August 2027, he'll be history. @SpokespersonGoK, you're welcome to congratulate us in advance.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@FGaitho237 You left out Oburu Odinga, or is he inconsequential?

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Apology accepted. We appreciate that she's obviously dumb, coming from a country that gave the world Trump (twice), where lettuce is "salad," serviettes are "napkins," football is "soccer," and the sport they insist on calling "football" is played mostly with hands.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@bakhita_esther Stick to your lane, dumb politics; leave culinary matters to the chefs.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Ata ajenge stadium to host the CAF tournament at his Kilgoris farm, Wantam is inevitable.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@KenyanSays I'll not pay 2k to sit on a plastic chair.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans If I were Oburu, I'd be very worried about the likelihood of losing the Siaya senatorial seat, which he only won courtesy of Raila, who's no longer in play.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@John63681549 And you all thought D-minus grads were complete dunderheads. Turns out they can still surprise you

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans Someone, please tell her Kenya is the kind of place where someone can be herding goats in Turkana, browsing on a Tecno, gloating over Sheryl Gabriella's nudes and getting paid via M-Pesa—without any of it seeming unusual. So yes, we're already past the mirror era.

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@TomPFCMolloy @joshpearson180 Now Thatcher has entered the fray. 😂 😂

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@NRNBreaking Kwani valuation ya multimillion and billion ilishuka?

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans This guy is so funny 🤣🤣 o

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@Kenyans This is so CRINGE!

[Caspary @Caspary01]

@DrJuma_M Don't give the botanist ideas. He'll get one of these at 14.2 billion.