Furries are one of the most toxic demographics on the internet. People will brutally lash out just because they're "supposed to", or because they're afraid of being attacked themselves. The entire culture is built on social pressure and fear. Only once you stop caring what people think will you come out on top.
I have to say you were right about everything I saw; nobody is a zoo just for having dildos, or even for simply liking feral art. They're just crazy and looking for the flavour of the month drama to distract themselves from whatever life problems they're dealing with. Everyone would do best to ignore them.
Remake your server to spite them, and keep preaching what you know to be true. As a zoo myself, I hereby verify it.
Not that also being one would be bad, but that's an entirely different conversation. Apologies, and take care.