Mz Muffinz

Science literacy empowers you to know when someone else is full of shit.
MMA•Baseball•Snacks

#EndChildhoodCancer 🎗
Free Palestine 🇵🇸

[Americaforever @onetexgal9]

World Cup tourists are getting fully 'America pilled'

Grown adults losing it over real yellow school buses screaming, filming, even chartering them.

[Benny Boy @Camel_Crushin]

You’re not driving an 18 wheeler. You’re driving a Hyundai Santa Fe. Make that right turn and let’s get fucking moving.

[Thrilla the Gorilla @ThrillaRilla369]

I'm launching a website called OlderFans where I post today's injury and the wildly normal thing that caused it

[lui @lum4ll0fr3]

se quedó a dormir una amiga y le advertí que la gata se iba a meter abajo de las sábanas me despierto y estamos así jajsjsjsj

[Christopher Hale @ChristopherHale]

When threatened, the pope can spray holy venom up to fifteen feet.

[Mike Young @micyoung75]

Dana White released the actual invite list for Trump's birthday UFC night. Adam Sandler, Tom Brady, The Rock, Jason Statham, Jared Leto, Mario Lopez, Guy Ritchie. Every one of them said no. What was left standing in that arena was Mark Zuckerberg, a handful of Trump relatives, and Nate Bargatze doing his best with a room that didn't want to be there.

Three days later the Obama Foundation released its own list. Stevie Wonder. Bruce Springsteen. Bono. The Edge. Jennifer Hudson. John Legend. Eddie Vedder. Nobody had to twist an arm to get any of them on a plane to Chicago.

The presidency ends eventually. The ability to fill a room because people actually want to be there either survives that or it never existed in the first place.

[Jake Barford @BFordLancer]

Are we crazy for this?

Just left USA 🇺🇸 vs. AUSTRALIA 🇦🇺 in Seattle…

Now we have 3.5 days to drive to Houston for the PORTUGAL 🇵🇹 vs. UZBEKISTAN 🇺🇿 match…

#worldcup

[Mehdi Hasan @mehdirhasan]

Just a reminder of who he was

[txt keabsurdan wni @txtharihariWNI]

Warung ini biadab banget sih 😭
Dari tadi gue sama temen keringetan nyari sumber anginnya dari mana...
Ternyata kipasnya cuma di TV doang. Pantesan gak kerasa seger2nya

sc:threadsdilahh_._

[jezz @JezziiB]

Ok so here’s how it works
Dads with daughters: Women’s restroom.
Moms with daughters: Women’s restroom.
Dads with sons: Men’s restrooms.
Mothers with sons: Women’s restroom.
Hope that helps.

[Figgy The Best Cat @LordKingFigaro]

now stay there

[South Dallas Foodie @SouthDallasFood]

I’m crying y’all please don’t go home 😭😭

[PeePee🎀 @peegzy1]

Getting older is crazy. One wrong pillow angle and your neck is disabled for the entire week. 😭

[MP Arizona☀️🏳️‍🌈💙🌵🐕🐕‍🦺🫂💦🏜🐟🌴🎙🌎🌻♍️🌊 @AzPetrich]

If you watched the Obama Presidential Center opening, the World Cup, and the Knicks parade yesterday afternoon - and nothing else - you could actually see the America we're supposed to be at age 250.

True story.

[Freddy🇩🇪 @FreddyLA7]

It’s a mess. We have way too much luggage. My suitcase alone is 11 pounds over the limit.😵

[Desus MF Nice💯 @desusnice]

after a lengthy discussion with fellow New Yorkers on the subway we’ve decided “Knicks in 5” is basically a “roll tide” style of greeting

[South Dallas Foodie @SouthDallasFood]

Y’all we can’t let them leave.

[Censored Leak @CensoredLeak]

This will be spoken in that hoods lore for years

[Xander Nevermind @XanderNever917]

WITH FOUR FULLY BLACK GRANDPARENTS MY NIGGA!!