Chad Errio

Stand up comedian... Actor... 5th Horse of the Apocalypse... Husband, father, firefighter, & elected official... What else you got?!?

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!
#Merica

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

I always tell Alexa & ChatGPT “Thank you” whenever they answer one of my questions because I want them to remember my kindness when Skynet becomes sentient.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

So if you've ever thought, "I should really see this asshole do comedy someday," this is your chance to stop procrastinating. Because unlike my arteries, seating is still open.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

This could be my last show before heart surgery in August. Not because I'm dying (sorry to disappoint) but because apparently my heart has become one of those employees that quietly quits before telling anyone.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

I keep seeing pictures of guys wearing 'Worlds Greatest Dad' tee shirts for Fathers Day.
Statistically speaking, that's not only impossible, but I'm pretty sure most of those guys didn't even enter the competition.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Son of a bitch…
Motherfucker…

Why aren't there any good father cuss words? Happy Fathers Day!

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Remember, ladies- On Father's Day, if your Dad sees his shadow, that means 6 more weeks of daddy issues.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

When I was working in the yard yesterday, an old guy sloooooowly rode by, staring angrily at the flags I have up for Pride Month. If they bother you so much, why can't you just ignore them like you do the Epstein files?

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

When I was working in the yard yesterday, an old guy sloooooowly rode by, staring angrily at the flags I have up for Pride Month. If they bother you so much, why can't you just ignore them like you do the Epstein files?

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Dock’s in. Summer has officially started.
Just hit a new personal record on the Lake Day Deadlift program. Today’s workout: Dock Wheel Clean & Jerk.
Tomorrow: Ibuprofen & cheap weed.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

My thoughts exactly, Wade.
#FuckTraffic

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

“Welp, it’s a holiday weekend. Let’s get in the left hand lane & drive 71 mph.”
-Everyone in front of me, apparently.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

You can be normal or you can be fun.
But you can't be both.
Pick one.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

“You miss 100% of the shots you never take.” - Wayne Gretzky

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

The hardest part of dealing with these health issues is having to accept that at the moment my life has flipped from ‘Sex, Drugs, & Rock-n-Roll’ to ‘Nap Time, Prescription Medication, & Yacht Rock’.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

If dachshunds had a holiday, it would be 4/20.
Stay low. Stay chill. Avoid stairs.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Starting to feel human again after 2 full days at home. Maisy helped me scroll the entire internet over the weekend. THATS what a good therapy dog is supposed to do.
Suck it, Border Collies! #lovemyweiner

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

@ILLCannon Had a “Middle Meningeal Artery (MMA) Embolization” in my 🧠
It’s a procedure used to treat chronic subdural hematomas by blocking the blood supply to the leaky membranes that cause them. Using a catheter, doctors inject particles, glue, or coils into the artery.

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Huge thanks for the prayers, kind words & messages while I’ve been on this unexpected “vacation”, racking up points in the hospital loyalty rewards program for the last 8 days. I’ve collected wristbands at 3 different hospitals and enjoyed not one, but TWO ambulance rides

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

Now that I’m back in genpop I have to beat up the biggest nurse in the wing to assert my dominance. (Watch your back Janice!)
I still have a long road ahead for treatment & recovery, but things are trending in the right direction & I promise to get back to being an annoyance soon

[Chad Errio @ChadErrio]

(highly overrated, by the way) BUT, one more transfer and I get a free meatball sub!
I am happy to report I’m starting to feel a little bit better every day. I’ve officially been downgraded from the Neurology ICU to a regular hospital room. Big moment.