We are overstimulated and we don't even notice. Netflix while eating. Reels in the bathroom. Music while cooking. Podcasts on walks. We consume by default, not by intention. You keep filling every gap, then wonder why you feel foggy and unmotivated. Boredom and silence are the real growth drivers. They give you space to think and create. That's when solutions show up for problems that have been stuck for months. Leave some room.
The way you stand out is to treat them like normal human beings. Stop being impressed by their beauty, stop making their beauty the only part of their personality you allow yourself to see. These women have rich inner lives, become interested in that
you unlock an entire world of freedom when you stop doing things that you believe illustrate a “good life” and ask yourself “what would truly bring me joy if i couldn’t tell anyone i did it?”
People are taught to use their imagination to control their circumstances.
They are told that their words can shape their future.
They are made to obsess over power to perform miracles *as they please*.
At the root of all of these heterodox teachings is the idol of control. That same sin of Adam. The desire to live independently of God. But what true faith and rootedness in God looks like is great dependence.
This is why even within the God-head, Jesus repeatedly makes the point that He does nothing except what He sees the Father do. Because there is no such thing as true communion without unity of purpose.
And this is what God has called us to in Christ, to participate in His purposes, not to make up stuff according to our wild ambitions. This is something we must deliberate discern and pushback on in a culture where the church is greatly insistent on making a great name for herself.
We must revisit the words of Christ in the gospels: “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” - John 15:4–5.
God is not calling us to do great things of our own accord. He is simply asking His people to be obedient to what he requires of them per time. Any conception of faith that stirs you into aimless pursuits of grand ambitions will wreck your soul. The pressing question before you must always be what will God have me do in service to Him where I am with the resources I have.
You must become comfortable with entrusting your future to God who has said He will never leave you nor forsake you. This promise should free you from anxiety and terrible theology of bending the future and your circumstances to your will. Many of these stuff are simply delusional.
There can be no true fellowship with God without utter surrender. And many of these false ideas on faith are attempts to avoid the humility that comes with realizing that God is wholly sovereign over our circumstances. He leads and we follow and we must return to Him again and again for clarity, direction, daily bread and wisdom because He is the true shepherd of our souls.
This honestly might be the most beautiful description of marriage I've ever heard.
THIS is what it means to love your spouse as Christ loves us. CHILLS.
Lemme tell you guys about how God made me stop yelling at my child.
I shouted at my child… and lost my voice for 2 months 😳, I had to BEG God to restore it. God said to me, "Speak to him the way you’d speak to someone you deeply respect". Authority + honor = real discipline.
I have noticed that the people who changed my life did not try to change my life. they were simply in the room being themselves with such completeness that the completeness altered me. through proximity alone. the way a fire alters the room simply by being lit inside it.
Please get back to doing puzzles, sudoku, board games, crosswords, word search. Read long novels and watch long form videos.
Seeing my students and even my age-mates uncomfortable being cognitively unentertained is... something. We’re losing patience with thinking deeply.
@thecindynoir Self love isn’t just boundaries with others, it’s accountability with yourself
The real glow up starts when you stop excusing your own bad habits
Early in my career, a mentor told me something I didn’t fully grasp:
“As a woman, you marry your ceiling.”
Years later, after working with lots of talented women, I’ve seen how true this is. The partner you choose can either expand your ambitions… or quietly shrink them.
A secure partner doesn’t compete with your light, they amplify it. They create space for you to grow.
It seems a common experience in the lives of people with high agency is that they, at some point, metaphorically, lean against a wall and discover that there is a hidden door. That some constraint they’ve been told about turns out not to hold, and this allows them to experience something positive. And from this they get into the habit of testing if walls are actually doors, and the more they do so, the more examples of hidden doors they find, and the more inclined they are to look for them. Far from the only thing that sets them apart, but having that experience can be transformative.
Nobody can throw my past in my face. I will personally sit down and tell you the story from beginning to end. What may be your gossip is my testimony and I’ve made peace with everything.