Chase the comic

I tell long-winded stories and follow back.

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@SenSchumer Fuck you Chuck

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@JohnFugelsang I thought Lex Luthor was still running Amazon? When did he become president?

[Live On The Chat @LiveOnTheChat]

Did you all see Jared Kushner after the #TrumpPressConference ?

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@Eminem says MGK isn't worth his time and is a nobody, but the boy has him releasing two diss tracks in two weeks. Must be doing something right. #KILLSHOT

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A Day No Pigs Would Fry #MakeABookHealthy

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I can't remember the #LastTimeIDrankTequila, or the time before that, or the time before that...

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BRING BACK ECTO COOLER FOR GOOD! QUIT PLAYING WITH MY EMOTIONS... @CocaCola @CocaColaCo

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the great grapesby
#EdibleBooks

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Nectarines are just redheaded peaches
#UselessTriviaThatIKnow

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RRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuGGGGGGGGgggggggggggggggaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuurrrrrrrraaaaaaaaagggggggggg #WhatZombiesAreThinking

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The Master and Margaritas #BoozeBooks

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Betty White will bury us all! https://t.co/wUpwBvloVV

[Samuel Hammond 🦉 @hamandcheese]

I caught a spectator getting taken out by a huge wave on a Key West livestream and gif'd it #hurricaneirma2017 #HurricaineIrma

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#UMightBeASuperVillain if you waste precious getaway time explaining your plan to the hero instead of just shooting him and #winning

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Leaders in North Korea are searching news feeds for our response to their missile launch, but everyone's busy with Arpaio, Gorka, and Harvey

[billy eichner @billyeichner]

Alex Jones ambushing people on the st without asking them a single question about REESE WITHERSPOON is exactly what's wrong in this country

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John Snow and Gendry bone down on a row boat! #FakeGameOfThronesSpoilers

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Now You Tallahassee Me

#statecapitalamovie

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Clear my browser history

#My4WordObituary

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I don't think The Doors are a good band.

#ConfessYourUnpopularOpinion