ƈhelsø♘

they/bitch she/baby

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Commercials be like “do you want to lower your drug costs?”

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

@twodykesandamic getting 🥵 at the local watering hole because ladies softball is on the tube. Oh and also thinking of y’all and the incredible show at @ComedyOnState

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

This goose is all I think about lately

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Kwik trip coffee area is so overwhelming. Doing too much!

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Why is my Lyft driver trying to call “Mavis” rn?

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Writing up my 2023 reading list because I’m sexy 😈

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

@moonfeeels It’s my name right?

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

@_gutterslut What’s even more embarrassing is me getting ghosted by a Milwaukee “comedian” I think they became aware that I’m funnier than them and couldn’t bare it. At least that’s what I’m telling myself 🥸

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

When I slip and fall on ice in my thirties, I just sit there a while before getting up.

[Acyn @Acyn]

“Because apparently the human suffering of the correspondent in the elements isn't enough, I’m going to show you what happens when I toss this cup of boiling water in the air..”

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

@moonfeeels I loooooove that smell tho

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Forgot my chapstick at home 😢

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Just saw a kid walking with a Seroogy’s box. Damn they’re really still doing that?

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

BEST IN SHOW, FRENCH BULLDOG, WINSTON

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Happy dog show day y’all.

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

I'm really 32 and had to google how to bake a fucking potato

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

I was gonna bake a potato but just read that it takes 45-60 mins. damn wtf?

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

I decided to login into twitter today and looking through my tweets is so TRIGGERING 😂

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Y’all thought I forgot? Just been busy rearranging lube for billionaires

[ƈhelsø♘ @ChelkeHays]

Odorless food only on the train please.