CHISM (REDUCED FAT)

Big older brother in a Disney channel show energy.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Dear @TheDaxFlame,
Please watch my video to you / about you. This is the most important video I will ever make.

https://t.co/7JV1Uk65JN

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

I’m starting to believe that Oppenheimer is a prank and they will never actually make the movie, keep pushing it back, and eventually announce that every actor in Hollywood is in the film.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Words of wisdom on a Sunday morning

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Applied for a job and they responded asking to check my credit score.

I, for one, welcome the nuclear apocalypse.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

If I’m elected I promise to make it legal to fully murder anyone who says ‘nobody wants to work these days’

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Upset about gas prices? Get a fucking bike! Use your damn legs! Shut the hell up!

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

The Queen is finally turtley enough for the turtle club

[Honeydew Wilkins @HoneydewWilkins]

The Queen lookin like a million bucks

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@michaeloburns Where!?!

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Everyone is being very cringe about the Ukrainian President.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@michaeloburns

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

If you’re waiting for the Louis CK show in Kyiv STAY IN LINE!

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@michaeloburns The king and queen of England

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

I played the Lion in my high school production of The Wizard of Oz, and it was a similar experience.

[IndieWire @IndieWire]

Paul Dano Couldn’t Sleep While Filming ‘The Batman’ Due to Playing a ‘Terrifying’ Riddler https://t.co/CdeeqobQRh

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

I’ve literally had Taco Bell one time in the past 12 months. Never had a streak like this since having Taco Bell the first time. At points in my life it would have been impressive that I only went one time in a week.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@soundproofliz MUCH CRUNCHY

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

The Oscar noms are lucky that Morbius was delayed so much

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

NOT THEIR BOTTOMS AND BREASTS!!! HOW DO YOU REMAIN PURE?! HOW DO YOU KEEP ALL THAT SEED INSIDE BRIAN!!??

[Brian Sauvé @Brian_Sauve]

A brief 🧵of exhortation to my Christian brothers in light of the absolute tsunami of sexual temptation they face every day.

Brothers, you have no choice but to live in a world where even some of your professed Christian sisters parade their bottoms and breasts in front of you.

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

Barb and Star were snubbed

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@itskyleromero OHHHH the H. stands for ‘Homer’

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

On my Garfield shit.

Hating Monday,
Eating Lasagna,
Being the President

[CHISM (REDUCED FAT) @ChismCornelison]

@lewisianbray King shit 🔥