I_am_Chi_Som

Christian | Wife | Mother | Biologist

[Swoop App NG @swoopappng]

₦1500 gets you the Xl Value Munch from The Place on Swoop!

[👑S.A.L.A.K.O🕊 @UnkleAyo]

I received this DM from a concerned girlfriend and I feel an obligation to share.

If you are able to help or weigh in, please do.

If you can't, please share on your timeline for anyone who is able to. 🙏

[👑S.A.L.A.K.O🕊 @UnkleAyo]

I have one piece to share.

I hope all these TL conversations do not poison your heart.

I hope you're not training your mindspace to start choosing partners from a place of fear, or lowered likelihood to cheat. Ask Israel Juju.

These are faulty compasses.

Churchgoers cheat. Atheists cheat. Hijab wielders cheat.

Virgins cheat. Adelebos cheat. 20s cheat. 30s cheat. 40s cheat.

I hope the factors that calibrate your values, are not from Twitter thinkpieces but are strengthened offline. Else, you will end up as a box of ruin.

My safest predicators for relationships are:

- brackets,
- reciprocity.

If you're doing well financially, box within potentials like you doing well financially. Don't be a 7fig earning techie & you'll be hunting smallies struggling with 200L carryover in Laspotech.

Mental brackets. Intellectual brackets. Financial brackets. Exposure brackets.

One of my theories as to why, people (read men) scale way below these brackets is because they're scripting scenarios for control. They're hunting "bendable" women. Chief, she won't be naive forever - but I'll expand on this, some other time.

Be big on reciprocity. As you're doing for your partner in the early weeks, if they like you they would be doing as much.

Using the filters of brackets and reciprocity, are safer predicators than fear and paranoia.

[Christy( mother of many Generations) @itzchristunique]

A mutual got debited of 395,424 from her GT bank account for no reason.

She mailed them and was told it will take up to 40-90 days for it to be resolved.

No good respond, no transparency and how it was taken out..

Today she went to the bank and the only good thing they could tell her was that there's nothing they can do..

She was told that even if she likes,let her sleep in rhe bank.

They also told her she was the one that used the money.

She didn't initiate the transaction but GT bank claimed she had used her ATM card to make the transaction..

Since you GT bank claimed the ATM card was used, why not should her the evidence?

At least provide evidence indicating it was through the ATM that the money was deducted..

The nonchalant and "you will do nothing" attitude here is top-notch..

If it was a well known person or a rich person, I am very sure they will try to protect their bank and solve the issue at once..

Please let's create awareness for her so she can recover her Money..
Let's make this known to everyone..

If you have experienced this with any bank, please this is your chance to call them out..

This is the best Time to call them out.. don't air this please..

GT bank refund @AdageorgeA her money please!!!

[TERRORIST SURVIVOR 💪🏽 @GbolahanOlanyi0]

How I was kidnapped by bandits, the scariest day of my life. 😫🥹💔
@NigeriaStories
@Wizarab10

[Kush @kush_147]

Consider how hard it is to change yourself, and you will understand how foolish it is to think that you can change someone else

[Mandela 🇳🇬 @Mandela008_]

The consequences arrived before the lesson did.
No advice will undo what happened.
But if you want even a chance:
Own it fully no excuses, no minimizing.
Understand this she didn’t just lose trust in a husband. She lost a pregnancy because of your actions.
Give her space. Chasing her now looks like panic, not remorse.
Get counseling not to save the marriage, but to understand yourself first.
The real question isn’t “How do I get my wife back?”
It’s “Why did I do this in the first place?”
Answer that honestly.
Everything else follows from there

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@realsabigurl @Only1Etubo I prefer this too 🥹😂

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@eaosas @esther_stan Beautifully said. ☺️

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@OutfitZoo Lol! This comment section is funny. Where she did state that she has never felt God’s love except from through a man alone? If your partner doesn’t make you feel this way, maybe you should reevaluate your relationship.

[Sheila of the Most High @sheilatebra]

I never thought about this until now but women in the Bible never had to go into the wilderness. Moses? 40 years. Jesus? 40 days. David? years running from Saul. but women? God met them RIGHT WHERE THEY WERE. Hagar in the desert, God came TO her. Mary at home, the angel came TO her. women don’t have to GO find God in isolation. God comes TO the feminine.

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@_raesparkles My love, speak for yourself please 🥹

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@gmltony Here’s mine 😁

[Sir Dickson @Wizarab10]

Brokeshame women for not bringing anything to the table.

*meets woman who brings something to the table

“Don’t collect anything from a woman. Her money is her money. Her house is her house. Provision is your shield.”
.
.
.
All the “what do you bring to the table” na for show. Your pocket cant cash your ego. Women are right. You don’t know what to do with good successful women?

[OLAKUNLE🪖 @Olakunle_Omoba]

GUYYYYSSSSSSS 😭😭😭
LET’S MAKE THIS HAPPENNNNN 😭🔥
LIKES! COMMENTS! SHARES!
EVERYTHING COUNTS PLEEEEEEASE 😭😭😭😭🙏🔥

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@Olakunle_Omoba @olxwaseun All the best!

[Alex Onyia @winexviv]

I’ve noticed something.

Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala studied at Harvard, ran Nigeria’s Ministry of Finance, now leads the WTO yet when she speaks, she is unapologetically Nigerian.
Same with Chimamanda Adichie. Global mind. Nigerian soul.

But watch some people who left Nigeria 6 months ago suddenly full foreign accent, complete rebrand, identity reset.

Here’s the hard truth nobody tells you:
No matter how much accent you acquire, that society will never fully accept you as one of them.

Authenticity is not a disadvantage.
It’s leverage.

Indians understood this early. They went global without deleting themselves, accent, culture, confidence intact. And today, they dominate boardrooms, tech, medicine, and politics worldwide.

Trying to sound “less Nigerian” doesn’t make you global.
It makes you forgettable.

The world rewards originals, not imitations.

Be excellent. Be global.
But be yourself first.

Nigeria needs to hear this.

[Nsikan @CkanJohnson]

You can’t change someone. But you will anyway.

Not through arguments or ultimatums or that thing you do where you get really quiet and hope they’ll notice you’re upset. (They never do, by the way. They just think you’re tired.) You’ll change them the way water changes stone, by being around them long enough that they start to see themselves through your eyes.

I dated someone who interrupted everyone. Constantly. Mid-sentence, mid-thought, didn’t matter. It drove me insane for months. Then one night at dinner with friends, I watched her do it again, and this time she caught herself. She looked at me, then back at the person she’d cut off, and said, “Sorry, keep going.” Nobody else even noticed. But I knew: she’d started hearing herself the way I heard her.

That’s the thing they don’t mention when they say “accept people as they are.” You do accept them. And then they feel that acceptance so deeply that they finally have enough safety to look at the parts of themselves they’ve been running from their whole lives. Not because you demanded it. Because you made space for it.

But here’s the trap: if you’re asking “can I change her” with a specific outcome in mind, you’ve already lost. You’re not in a relationship anymore. You’re in a renovation project. And people can smell that a mile away. They can feel when your love has conditions attached. It makes them smaller, more defended, and less likely to grow into anything you’d actually want. Honestly, it usually just makes them better at hiding.

The real question isn’t whether you can change someone. It’s whether you can love someone enough that they feel free to change themselves. And whether the direction they’re growing is toward you or away from you.

Sometimes you date someone, and she becomes kinder, more thoughtful, and more herself. Sometimes she becomes exactly who she’s always been, just louder. And sometimes, this is the one that hurts; she grows into someone beautiful. Just not someone beautiful for you.

You can’t control which one happens. You can only decide how long you’re willing to wait to find out.

[I_am_Chi_Som @Chunchimiranda]

@Wizarab10 I left for work by 5:30 and got there by 9:45. Very crazy morning