To everyone who has DMed me, sorry for not replying yet. I'm not great at talking to one person let alone over 60. I'm a bit overwhelmed with life at the moment, but I will respond as soon I can. Each of you deserve respect and my undivided attention. Thank you for understanding.
Loneliness. But I quit because it just made me feel more lonely. My depression got worse and I just couldn't mentally handle it.
I wish I could have someone to guide me, step by step. I know I sounds childish, but I can't understand why people can't just help each other freely.