Collette Reitz

freelance writer/editor. next adventure tk. formerly @elitedaily. yes, i'm lurking here. she/her.

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

I already need to use a prescription toothpaste.

My teeth can’t handle RFK Jr. “going wild” on removing fluoride from the drinking water!! 😭🫠

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

me updating my resume as a digital media professional:

“in terms of computer, I would say [s]he's probably about as good as you get.”

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Trump on Elon Musk: “In terms of computer, I would say he’s probably about as good as you get”

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

send me your holiday pitches please!! :)

[Apartment Therapy @AptTherapy]

Apartment Therapy is looking for contributors for upcoming holiday content! We want writers who can talk about flight hacks, hosting hacks — and everything in between. Pitch us here by Thursday, Oct. 24. Article rate is $250: https://t.co/r24BOIzBDb

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

halloweentown premiered? i’m sorry i think you meant to say that halloweentown INVENTED CINEMA!

[Film Updates @FilmUpdates]

26 years ago, ‘HALLOWEENTOWN’ premiered on Disney Channel.

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

me every time the lacheys pop up in #LoveIsBlind7

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

me after leaving a bath and body works in 1999. #artstuff #rollonglitter

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

when i write “TK” in a draft:

[Bradley Whitford @bradleywhitford]

I have concepts of a plan!

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

Taylor Swift to Beyoncé rn:

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

Just putting this out there @taylorswift13 — Haunted x The Black Dog mashup for Saturday, Aug. 17. 👻🖤🐶

[Apartment Therapy @AptTherapy]

Calling all real estate agents! 📣 We’re taking a deep dive into real estate trends — and we’d love for you to share your insights by taking this short survey by Friday, 7/26 at noon ET! (You have a chance to win one of two $100 Amazon gift cards.) https://t.co/UDC7KENONc

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

ummmm what?

“Unable to follow more people at this time.”

why is this a thing? (also this is the first account i tried to follow today 🫠)

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

Some women are natural beauties.

And some women have to ask their hairdressers to cut the bulk out of the bottom of their shoulder-length hair so they don’t look like the little lad who loves berries and cream.

(I’ve literally only ever known the latter. 😂)

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

@karafagan doing the lord’s work 👏👏👏

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

I need the Foxtrot/Dom’s documentary asap.

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

every digital media editor one month after publishing a new issue or vertical:

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

Y’all I’ve been crushing since my 13 yo self caught a glimpse of him on Real World Paris 🫠🙃😍

[Scott Yager @SHOTOFYAGER]

CT is so charming on The Traitors it’s insane.

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

Me when I decide my period is over on day 5 no matter what my body is doing:

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

it me 😅😅😅

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

I was trying to sing, “Karma is the guy on the Chiefs coming straight home to me,”

But what came out was, “Karma is the guy on the STREET coming straight home to me.”

Like, I get it, I am *not* Taylor Swift. But the street?!?! Damn.

[Collette Reitz @Collette_Reitz]

I want to be so publicly petty to a company rn, but I just can't.

It's been the worst consumer experience of my life, but they shall remain nameless.

Thanks a lot for the (lapsed) Catholic guilt, Mom and Dad!